The Revolution: Chapter 7

“I’m losing him,” Luke said, his voice a sad murmur in the darkened room. Leia sat by him, the two of them gazing out the large window, watching the last of the atmosphere fire shows. The banquet had ended an hour ago, but there were those that continued their own personal celebrations. Jaina, Han and some of the other TwinSuns pilots had gone out to one of the local cantinas. Han had, yet again, tried to persuade Luke to join them, but Luke graciously refused, explaining that the night had worn him out. Whereas, in reality, he was disturbed by his encounter with the new young woman and conflicted with his relationship with his son.

After Lilliya had passed out in his arms, Luke went to find Ben to see if he could convince him to come with Luke to Ossus, if only for a few months. He was able to find Ben inside his personal quarters. Ben was more aggravated than Luke expected him to be, and the conversation had quickly gone sour with no positive result in Luke’s favor. “I can’t even get him to listen to me for one minute.”

Leia sighed and took Luke’s hand in hers. “He’s just going through something,” she said. “And he needs to do it alone. He’s becoming a very talented pilot, you know.”

“I don’t have anything against him learning how to fly,” Luke said. “But he can get the same pilot training on Ossus and even better. He would be taught how to use his Force skills in conjunction with his physical training.”

“Ben has an aversion to the Force,” Leia said grimly. “It’s brought him nothing but pain…at least, that’s how he sees it.”

Luke’s jaw clenched and he forced himself not to say anything. He wanted to say, “everybody goes through pain in life whether you have the Force or not,” but the pain Ben had experienced, he experienced before he was out of his own mother’s womb. That mother, he lost to his mentor and cousin, Jacen. Luke could understand, he could sympathize, but he still refused to accept that his only son had disowned the way of the Jedi. Ben was his only son, after all.

“I wish I could help him,” Luke finally said, a wave of sadness rolling over him.

They stayed silent for a long time. Leia was busy thinking, however, and thinking hard. She was trying to think of a way to make her brother happy, to convince Ben to go to Ossus. All the while, Lilliya kept popping up in her mind and then she couldn’t stop thinking of her.

“I have an idea,” Leia said, turning to look at Luke. “What do you think of bringing Lilliya with you?”

Luke frowned, then immediately shook his head no. “I don’t think so…”

“Wait a minute, before you completely knock down my idea,” she said. “Maybe bringing her to the Jedi Temple, being surrounded by Jedi, will help shed light on what she is. She isn’t Yuuzhan Vong, I believe that now. If she were an intruder, she had her chance at the Crystal Ballroom to kill a lot of important officials, but she didn’t.

“Of course, she did have tight security on her, but even still, if she was a walking Vong bomb, she would have exploded by now. If she was a spy, she would have found a way to infiltrate the Alliance security network. Her identification checks out, and if we weren’t so adept in the Force, we wouldn’t be questioning her identity at all.

“There is something very different with her. I have a feeling…she is something we’ve never encountered before. I sense she is harmless, for now. But what if something changed in her, something we couldn’t possibly predict because we are blind to her?” Leia shook her head, uncomfortable with the thought of being attacked totally unawares. This must be how “normal” people felt all the time.

“No,” she said, reaffirming her plan. “We must find her out, understand her and know what and who exactly she is. She isn’t entirely human, but you and I are the only ones that know this. Other than the MD droid, of course. And I have a feeling that she doesn’t know it either.”

Luke sat silent, seeming to take it under consideration. And then he said, “How does this have anything to do with convincing Ben to come with me?”

“If I can get Ben to go to Ossus, you have to take Lilliya too,” Leia said, a slow smile curling up on her lips.

“You’re starting to sound more and more like your husband,” Luke grumbled, shaking his head in defeat.

Leia shrugged. “We are one in the same.”

“I’d like to know how you’re going to convince Ben,” Luke said.

Leia flashed a bright, mischievous smile, making her appear much younger and youthful. “I have my ways…”

 

There was a loud knock on the door and someone continuously pressed the door chime, till Ben finally pulled himself out of bed, angry and half asleep. He only wore shiny black pants that dragged slightly against the floor and didn’t care to cover his torso. Whoever was waking him at one in the morning had better have a damn good excuse.

He pressed the glowing blue button and the front door hissed open.

Jaina was standing outside the door, her hair a little disheveled, and her breath smelling of Corellian ale. Gavin and Wess were standing a little ways down the corridor, laughing quietly to themselves. The others must have gone home.

“This better be good,” Ben grumbled to his older cousin.

“It’s always good to chat with Benny,” Jaina smirked, as she leaned against the door panel. “I’ve come on a mission from Mom. But I’m not supposed to tell you that.” She snorted a laugh, shaking her head at herself.

“Are you drunk?” Ben said, more irritated now that he was woken up by his drunken cousin and that this also wasn’t the first time she came home like this. “Don’t you have to leave early for Endor tomorrow.”

She barked a laugh again. “Aw, Ben, you know I don’t need sleep. Besides, I’m not nearly as drunk as you think. Can I come in?”

“Maybe you should go to bed and get some rest,” Ben said, blocking the door frame with his muscular size, towering above the smaller frame of Jaina.

“Don’t need it,” Jaina said, brushing the suggestion off with a wave of her hand. “And besides, we need to talk. It’s important.”

“Can’t it wait until tomorrow?” Ben said, hoping maybe that would make her go away.

“Actually, no it can’t. You and I—we need to talk—right now.” When she emphasized now, suddenly her drunkenness seemed to disappear into total seriousness.

Ben forced himself not to say anything, pressing his lips together firmly. What could possibly be so important as to have a discussion in the middle of the night? And Jaina didn’t seem like she would be persuaded to leave. So he decided to let her in to get the “talk” over with as soon as possible.

“I won’t be long guys,” Jaina called out to Gavin and Wess. “Don’t go anywhere without me.” They waved at her as the sliding door hissed shut behind her.

“All right, what’s the problem?” Ben turned to her, leaning up against one of the lounge chairs.

Immediately and very surprisingly, Jaina went from being sloppy intoxicated to a deadpan sober. She didn’t move from the front entrance.

“The problem is you,” Jaina said, her voice clean of the inebriation.

That took Ben completely off-guard and he quickly jumped on the defensive. But before he could say anything, Jaina cut him off with a raise of her hand.

“Look, Ben,” she said, her tone low and serious. “I love you. You’re like a brother to me, and you know that. You and I have been through a lot of grish together and sometimes I still can’t believe we’re standing here alive.

“So with that said, there are a lot of things that I want to discuss with you, mainly about your situation with your dad.”

Ben stood up abruptly, understanding quite perfectly where the conversation was leading, and he wasn’t going to stand for it. “Oh, no. Not you too!” He whirled around to glare angrily out towards the glittering cityscape to gather his thoughts. He wasn’t prepared for this argument, that was for sure. “Come on, Jaina, you know I don’t want anything to do with the Jedi Academy.”

“It’s not just that you don’t want to go to Ossus with Luke—which is something I think you really need to do,” Jaina continued, still standing in the same spot, hands on her hips. “It’s the fact that you and Luke don’t act like father and son anymore. You guys barely talk and when you do actually speak to each other, it turns into an argument.”

“That’s because he won’t ever listen to me—”

“Oh, please!” Jaina interrupted with sudden fervor it shocked Ben into silence. “I am sick of hearing about this. You’re the one not listening and you know how I know this? Cause Luke has had years of training to be a good listener. It’s called JedI patience. And I also know you and how you argue. Besides no one wants to hear about your troubling, adolescent issues.”

Ben shot an icy glare in her direction, but then it suddenly turned pained.

Jaina took a deep breath as she watched her younger cousin sag in misery and forced herself to calm her own heated temper. Unclenching her fists, she slowly moved over to her silent cousin and leaned against the window opposite of him so that she could look him straight in the eye. His gaze never left the floor.

“I’m sorry,” Jaina said finally. “That was uncalled for.” She waited for him to respond and look up, but he didn’t.

When she spoke again, her voice was softer, more sympathetic. “Luke needs you, Ben. Badly. He needs to have his son at his side. You’re all he has. You should know this more than anyone.”

Ben looked up, but didn’t meet Jaina’s gaze, rather he stared off into the cityscape again.

“You owe him these few months, at least,” Jaina said, and her tone sounded more pleading.

Ben sat silently for a minute, lost in thought. “What about my classes?” he finally said. “I can’t just not show up.”

“Actually, Mom has that all taken care of,” Jaina said, perking up casually. “She already requested a temporary leave of absence in your name.”

Ben’s eyes lit up in anger again, but he quickly pushed the feeling aside, not wanting to add to the already uncomfortable argument. Instead, he said, “Isn’t that illegal.”

“Yeah, sure, but Mom has her ways. And she figured you really wouldn’t make a court case out of it.”

Ben rolled his eyes. Of course he wouldn’t. What was he going to do, sue his aunt and the President of the Alliance?

“I guess I never really had a choice then, did I?” Ben muttered.

“With Mom involved?” Jaina laughed. “Not really.” Jaina pushed herself off the glass and made her way to the front door. Ben followed.

“I’m not gonna like this,” Ben admitted.

“Nobody said you had to like it,” Jaina said, pressing the blue button to let herself out. Gavin and Wess waited in the corridor. Jaina spun around suddenly to Ben. “Oh, and before I forget. You’re also flying with Lilliya Tentle. She’s going to Ossus too.”

“What?!” Ben nearly shouted.

Jaina ignored his outburst. “Surprisingly enough, she was much harder to convince than you were. She’s got nothing here, so I assumed it would be easy. Turns out, she’s not too fond of JedI either. Funny—you two seem to have a lot in common. You guys should get along nicely.” That last comment came out more sarcastic than Jaina meant it to.

“You seem to have been busy tonight,” Ben said wryly.

“Unfortunately.” Jaina glanced back at her waiting comrades. “And now I’m gonna be more busy enjoying the rest of the night.”

“Why do I have to take her?” Ben said.

Jaina cocked her head to the side, bewildered by Ben’s distaste in Lilliya. “Why not?”

“I just get a bad feeling from her, that’s all,” Ben shrugged.

Jaina leaned in and peered closely at Ben as if she was going to tell a secret. “So does everyone,” she said matter-of-factly, then stepped back. “That’s why she’s going, though she doesn’t know it. She thinks she’s going for investigative purposes, so that the JedI could help in uncovering the mysterious new enemy we seem to have.”

Ben crossed his arms defiantly. “Well, you and Leia seemed to have this worked out perfectly. It’s a wonder if anyone gets a say in anything at all.”

Jaina smiled roguishly. “Then nothing would get done right. Pick up Lilliya at her apartment in the morning. Uncle Luke will already have left for Ossus, so it’ll just be the two of you.” She smiled again, but this time, much more insinuating. “Sounds like fun,” she said silkily. “Love you.”

With that, she turned on her heal and disappeared down the hall with Gavin and Wess.

Ben stood in the doorway for a couple minutes more before sliding the door shut.

 

***

 

Morning came swifter than Lilliya wanted. She could have used a couple more hours of sleep, but instead she forced herself out of bed to face the day she knew she would dread. In an hour, she was dressed in a simple grey jumpsuit and black knee boots, and was packed for the trip to Ossus. She didn’t know what compelled her to agree to go to a place full of JedI, but she also knew she had nothing to lose by going. What else was she going to do, be trapped inside this apartment and constantly followed by GP droids? Lilliya came to the conclusion that traveling to Ossus, despite its population consisting mainly of JedI, whom she thought creepy and disturbing, was better than being stuck on Coruscant.

Lilliya gazed out the large window, mesmerized by the heavy air traffic flowing in and out in perfect zigzag patterns throughout the city’s spires. The two suns gave the city a dull, metallic look, lacking any of the color it had the night before.

Three days ago, she would have been looking out at Endor’s lush greenery. Three days ago, she had a family and a career. Now, she had nothing. She was vaguely amazed at how much could change in just a day. She wondered what was to happen to her now.

The door chime snapped her out of her reverie and she strode over to open it. To her surprise, Ben Skywalker stood on the other side, tall and clad in a blue jumpsuit, typical of Academy pilots.

“Good morning,” he said.

“Hi,” Lilliya responded. “Where’s Luke Skywalker?”

“He left much earlier,” Ben said, and something close to irritation seemed to be struggling in his voice. “I’m supposed to take you to Ossus. You ready?”

Lilliya nodded, no longer certain if she wanted to go now. Shaking her uneasiness away, she grabbed a small bag of belongings she’d packed and followed Ben out. Again, to her surprise, the GP guard droids that stood at attention outside her door didn’t follow her this time. It felt like she was being released from prison.

It took about ten minutes for them to reach the docking bay where Ben’s small ship, a T4-9ner, brand new and sleek, sat waiting. Lilliya had heard a lot about them and mostly how they had yet to pass the air safety tests, meaning they weren’t entirely safe to fly because of how fast they were.

The two of them entered silently up the ramp and into the main cabin, Lilliya looking longingly at the little ship. She also always knew she wanted one.

“It’ll be just us two, but you can sit the trip out in here if you’d like,” Ben said, gesturing to the blue and silver swivel chairs that were bolted to the deck around a small lounge table. “Or there are the bed cabins down the hall there if you’d rather sleep on the way.”

“Sleep is tempting, considering I didn’t get very much of it,” Lilliya responded, glancing down the skinny pathway towards where a two bunk beds were hidden behind privacy doors. She assumed they were very claustrophobic, as were most bunks within ships this size. “I think I’d rather be up front in the cockpit. Much more comfortable that way.”

Ben shrugged, but Lilliya could tell he was trying to hide his disappointment. Maybe he wanted to spend the trip alone, but Lilliya never did like someone else flying her when she could do it herself. So he would have to deal with her company for a few hours.

Ben made his way to the cockpit—it was only a few steps more—with Lilliya close behind. The two sat in the forward chairs, Ben in the pilot’s seat and Lilliya in the co-pilot’s. The seats were comfortable and luxurious, melding to each of their body form and weight. Lilliya assisted Ben with the ignition and they were off in just a few minutes. The ship hummed quietly as it sped through Coruscant’s grey atmosphere, Lilliya watching the skyscrapers disappear beneath them, and burst out into the blackness of space. Security recognized Ben’s ship immediately so it didn’t take them long to get through and ignite into lightspeed.

The two sat side by side in awkward silence. Ben glanced over in Lilliya’s direction and noticed her long golden hair, laying in curls around her shoulders, and turned to silver once the stars’ lights no longer reached her.

“You weren’t kidding about your hair,” Ben said, breaking the dull silence. “That is an interesting trait you got going on there.”

Lilliya fingered one of her curls, glancing down at the opulent silvery color. “Yeah, it’s definitely something I’ve never been able to figure out,” she said, glancing in Ben’s direction shyly. “Among the many other things…”

Ben raised an eyebrow. He wondered exactly what she meant by that. The thought that went through his mind was the fact that she was invisible to the Force. Was she referring to that? Probably not.

“So, uh, tell me about yourself,” Ben said, forcing himself to make conversation. It was going to be a long trip and if she wasn’t going to ride it in the main cabin, then he’d better make something of her presence.

Lilliya shrugged, smiling crookedly. “There’s not much to tell,” she said softly. “What do you want to know?”

“Well, you’re a pilot, for one. Where’d you train?”

“My dad started teaching me to fly when I was a kid. He taught me everything I know. We lived most of the time on Endor, at the base, once it was established. Before that, I lived on Coruscant. But when my mother died…we moved.”

Ben was silent for a second. The two of them were staring off into the streaking light field. “What happened to your mother?” Ben asked.

Lilliya sighed, trying to recall the memory. It had been so long ago. “I remember that she was really sick, suddenly. My dad had her see so many doctors from all over, but none of them could give him a straight answer. They all said the same thing, ‘they’d never seen anything like it.’ She died in a week from the first day she got sick. It was…strange. One day she was perfect, the next…” Lilliya shrugged, remembering why she didn’t think about the memory in the first place. She was six at the time, but she never could fully recover from the loss of the mother. “I was really little and so I blamed it on myself for a long time.”

Ben frowned, but didn’t say anything. He continued to stare out the view screen. His expression was somber, from what Lilliya could tell.

“What about you?” Lilliya said, trying to turn the attention away from her. She could already feel the depression creeping up on her and she really didn’t want to deal with it. “Tell me about yourself.”

Ben shifted uncomfortably in his chair. “I study at the Coruscant Flight Academy. My dad’s a JedI Master. That’s about it.”

Lilliya raised her eyebrows in disbelief. “Interesting. I would think you would have a whole novel to tell me.”

Ben shrugged indifferently, not meeting her gaze.

“Are you a JedI too?” Lilliya asked.

Ben’s jaw twitched. “Not anymore,” he said.

“You had that lightsaber,” Lilliya pointed out, but hoped it wouldn’t bring back any hard feelings about her intrusion into his home.

“Yeah, it’s more like decoration,” he said. “Or a reminder.”

“A reminder of what?” Lilliya prodded.

Ben glanced at her in irritation, and then quickly flickered his gaze back out the view screen. “Of stuff I don’t want to get involved in anymore.”

Lilliya was taken aback. “Really? Then why are you going to Ossus?”

Ben exasperated a sigh. “I owe someone.”

“Like who?”

Ben turned a look on her that meant “none of your business” and Lilliya dropped the subject. The two sat in silence again, the ship’s gentle humming being the only sound in the cockpit. Ben began to twitch in his seat agitatedly.

“There’s food in the cabin behind us and hologames, if you’re interested,” Ben said, breaking the silence.

“Are you hungry?” Lilliya asked.

“Well, no,” Ben said, nervously glancing away from her. “But I mean, if you are? I thought I’d let you know you’re welcome to it…if you’re hungry…or bored.”

Lilliya stared at Ben curiously, then nodded slowly, understanding his meaning. He wanted her to leave the cockpit, to be farther from him. She felt her stomach get hot as frustration boiled inside her. A sardonic smile bent her lips.

“Why…” she said slowly, “do I get the feeling that you don’t like me very much? Is it because I was in your apartment?”

Ben didn’t answer or look in her direction.

Lilliya stared at him now, hoping that would get him to answer, if not annoy the sithspit out of him.

“You really don’t like me, do you?” Lilliya said, a little surprised and hurt by the idea.

Ben shot a glare at her, but he still refused to say anything. Although the icy look in his blue eyes said enough.

Lilliya felt heat crawl from her stomach and through her veins as she became flat out angry. She felt confused and offended that someone who barely knew her had already come to the conclusion that they didn’t like her. And for what? It angered her even more that she didn’t know why.

When Ben looked at her, he was surprised to see the strange diamond scar in her left eye flash a deep red.

“I think I’ll check out the hologames in the back,” Lilliya said darkly, her gaze not wavering from Ben’s.

“Sure,” Ben said quietly.

Without another word, Lilliya got up from her chair and calmly left the cockpit and Ben. They stayed apart like that for hours. Ben didn’t leave the pilot’s chair and Lilliya fell asleep in the main cabin, her head on the lounge table. It was the hyperdrive alarm, warning their arrival to Ossus, that woke Lilliya. She refused to not be present inside the cockpit during the landing, so she bit the insides of her cheeks and boldly walked back inside.

Ben glanced back in surprise, if only that he was reminded that there was another person on board, but quickly turned back to the controls. Lilliya slid quietly into the copilot’s chair as they came out of lightspeed.

Ossus was before them, a grey-brown of a planet. Much different than the green of Endor or the sparkling glitter of Coruscant. Once they were cleared by security, the ship began to make its dissent into Ossus’ atmosphere. It was daytime on the planet, which turned Lilliya’s silver hair back to gold.

They flew across desert, old brown forests, rocky cliffs, small grey lakes, until it seemed there wasn’t any civilization at all.

“Interesting place for a JedI establishment,” Lilliya muttered. “Pretty ugly.”

“Humph,” Ben sighed, turning the ship around a rocky bend and down a canyon where a small river ran. “Well, you’d better get used to it. This is where we’re staying for a few months.”

We?” Lilliya cocked an eyebrow in Ben’s direction.

Ben smiled cynically. “Yep. You and me. We’re gonna get to know each other really well. The academy is a pretty small place. Not much in the way of escape.”

Lilliya looked at Ben and allowed her expression to turn into a sour smile. “Great,” she muttered, and turned back to look out the viewport as they sped down the river. Suddenly, the cliffs and river seemed to drop off ahead of them, leaving only the blue skyline. As the ship got closer, she noticed the river dipped down into a massive waterfall. Lilliya’s sour expression slowly turned into astonishment.

Beyond the waterfall, past the rocky cliffs, there stood an impressive white and silver tower glowing in the center of a valley surrounded by a canyon and other falls. Birds of all kinds soared past them and disappeared into the jungle below. Lilliya could see little rivers flowing all throughout the wild green trees and flowers. Surrounding the glowing tower were little square-shaped structures she assumed were homes for those who resided here.

“Wow,” Lilliya whispered, as they circled the tower, its skin seeming to reflect into the cockpit. She couldn’t tell if there were windows or outlets along the outside. The material seemed so surreal. “I’ve never seen anything like it.”

“No one has,” Ben said. He set the ship down on one of the landing platforms at the edge of the tower. As soon as the ship powered down, Ben got up from his seat to gather his bags. When he left, Lilliya could have sworn she heard him give a nervous sigh. Before she went to get her things, she saw outside the cockpit’s window a gathering of people in various robes making their way to greet them. Lilliya gulped nervously as well.

She moved into the main cabin and grabbed the bag she had secured in one of the cubbies. Ben was already on his way down the ramp, so she had to hurry to catch up with him. He waved a short greeting at the group of robed people as Lilliya tried to stay close. The two entered through a double sliding glass door and into the central chamber of the tower. It was filled with people, and Ben was moving so fast Lilliya could barely keep up with him.

“Where are we going?” she called, her voice echoing in the reverberating chamber. Her voice nearly drowned out amongst all the other voices with people bustling around busily.

“Not sure where you need to be, but I’m heading off to my quarters,” Ben called back without stopping. “Good luck to you. See you around.” With that, he disappeared into the crowd.

Lilliya stopped following him and allowed herself to be engulfed in the crowd. She was beginning to wonder why she ever came. Someone bumped into her and she barely heard his or her apology. She also wondered why everyone was in such a hurry considering all the rumors she heard about the JedI Academy being a very peaceful place. Her first impression of it now was very hectic and confusing. She decided that she needed to find Luke Skywalker. Once she found him, everything would be okay.

“Excuse me,” she called to someone who moved by her, but they didn’t stop. So she continued down the hall, pushing herself through some of the congested passageways. “Excuse me,” she said again, and grabbed a male Bothan by the arm, her fingers sinking into his deep fur.

He turned and looked her up and down curiously.

“I’m looking for Luke Skywalker,” she said. “Can you tell me where I can find him?”

“He’s at the Cliff Sprie outside with his students,” the Bothan responded. “That way.” He pointed out towards an exit.

“Thanks,” Lilliya said and quickly made her way through and out of the congested lobby.

There were a lot less people here and it was much quieter, only the sounds of insects and wing-bearing animals could be heard. She started to walk in the direction of where the Bothan pointed and hoped that she wasn’t going in the wrong way. Or that she would get lost. Thankfully, she heard some voices in the distance as she walked down a stony path. As she neared, she saw about six people, all in tight-fitting jumpsuits, standing at the edge of a small cliff. Underneath the cliff was a river and across the gap was another cliff where more people stood waiting.

Lilliya held her breath as one of the students on her side jumped off the ground, flew into the air, and landed on the other side, clumsily falling to one knee. She was almost all the way to edge of the cliff, and at the end of the line of students, as each one made the jump. Some were more graceful than others and each time they leaped, Lilliya’s heart skipped a beat.

Finally, Lilliya was at the very edge and was close enough to see Luke Skywalker’s black-suited form on the other side. She was about to wave to catch his attention, but her foot caught a pebble that trickled over the edge of the cliff. She glanced down as she heard an electrical charge and noticed the pebble bouncing off a force field below.

Simultaneously, the last student to jump heard the crackle and glanced at Lilliya, was surprised to even see her standing next to him, and in mid-jump fell over the cliff’s edge.

Lilliya gasped and tried to reach out to him instinctively, and her heart stopped as she watched him fall, screaming all the way. And then he suddenly was caught by the force field, right above the river, and he lay there motionless.

Lilliya heard a synchronized moan emanate on the other side. She glanced up to see some of the other students shaking their heads and staring at her, confused about her presence. She felt her cheeks flush. Great entrance, she thought in annoyance.

In that moment, she heard something land in the gravel behind her. She turned and nearly fell backwards into the pit herself when she saw Luke Skywalker standing there.

“I didn’t do that,” she blurted, motioning towards the space where the last student had been. Then she wanted to smack herself for saying anything at all.

Luke smiled greatly, his sapphire eyes glittering in the hot sunlight.

“It’s all right, everyone,” he said, calling across the pit, and again she heard synchronized murmuring. “This is the guest I’d been telling you all about.” He glanced back at her, as she made a conscious decision to move away from the cliff’s edge. “I’m so glad you decided to come.” His smile creased his eyes, and suddenly Lilliya seemed to feel better immediately.

Lilliya heard more muffled landings as the students came back from across the pit. Even the boy who had fallen had already gained his strength back to levitate himself back to the group.

Luke stood beside Lilliya and gestured to his group of young students.

“I would like you all to meet Commander Lilliya Tentle,” Luke announced. “She will be with us for a few months, learning the ways of the JedI.”

Lilliya shot a surprised look at Luke, who seemed completely unaware. Suddenly, she didn’t feel so good anymore.

The murmur grew louder. The students were giving Lilliya a strange look that made her feel very exposed and very alien.

“Yes, I know it’s a little late to except a new student,” Luke continued, and Lilliya made a point to keep her mouth shut. “But I have strong hopes that Lilliya will become a great addition to the JedI.”

Lilliya’s jaw clenched tightly and willed herself to not throw a fit.

“Welcome, Commander,” one of the male students said, his voice smooth and chime-like.

Lilliya couldn’t seem to find her voice, so she just nodded in response.

“I think we can call for a recess today,” Luke said. “We will begin this exercise again tomorrow.”

The group dispersed immediately, some going off alone into the jungles, others going off in pairs towards the apartments and tower.

Lilliya, fists clenched, teeth grinding, met Luke’s smiling gaze.

“Well, now that you’re here,” he said, taking her bag from her hand. “Let’s get you settled in. I wasn’t sure if you were really coming, but I did reserve private quarters for you. This way.”

Lilliya followed him down the stone path and towards the grouping of small structures Lilliya had guessed were the apartments, still keeping her mouth shut.

Luke must have keyed into her silence and so kept talking.

“So did my son fly you here?” he asked.

“Yeah,” she muttered. “He so conveniently ditched me in the lobby too.”

Luke cocked an eyebrow but didn’t comment. “I wasn’t sure if he was coming either. He must have gone straight to his quarters. I’m surprised you were able to find me.”

“I had to stop one of your students and ask,” she answered. “By the way, how come it’s like a field day in there? I could barely move.”

“You came on a convenient day,” he said. “Today was visitor day. As a JedI student, you don’t get to see your family too often, so today is when the family members can come see their son or daughter. A student isn’t technically aloud to leave in the middle of training.” Luke gave Lilliya sideways glance. “For various reasons, of course.”

“Well, it was like hell trying to get through there,” Lilliya grumbled. “What is that place anyhow?”

“That?” Luke glanced at the glowing tower. “Is the JedI Temple. It’s fascinating, isn’t it? The metal is made from the sentient planet called Zonama Sekot. The remaining Yuuzhan Vong reside there now, in peace.”

“Why does it glow?”

“It’s an enigma, but we think it’s because the metal is alive and filled with the Force. It emanates a light reflecting its life. Maybe its aura.”

They walked down another stone path surrounded by numerous flowers this time. The path cut through the small apartments and then Luke stopped at one of the doors, punching in a code and stepping into the studio. He set Lilliya’s bag on the plain metal desk that stood by the door.

Lilliya stepped in and looked around. The room was plain. It had one window looking out towards the other apartments and gardens. It had one bunk bed, a closet and a bathroom, and then the desk near the door. It was small and simple, and not unlike her bedroom on Endor. It fit her quite nicely, actually.

“I won’t be under house arrest here, will I?” Lilliya asked, as Luke made his way out the door.

He smiled. “No. You’ll be free to go anywhere you like without having any guard droids at your back. I’ll let you get settled in. All you need to do is relax for today. Tomorrow is going to be a long day for you.”

“Oh, yes, about that,” Lilliya said, trying to keep the bottled up anger from entering her voice. “I was quite surprised that you volunteered me as a student. I was not told that was the plan when coming here. In fact, I was told something completely different.”

Luke’s smile faded for the first time, which kind of unnerved Lilliya. She had gotten so used to Luke having a smile plastered on his face. “You’re right,” he said. “I’m sorry about that. I assumed that you wouldn’t have any aversion to learning about our ways considering I sense in you the potential of being able to use the Force.”

Lilliya’s mouth nearly dropped. She remembered Jenar telling her that he thought she might have had the Force, but she really never took it seriously. As far as she was concerned, she’d much rather not have anything to do with it.

“I know that enrolling into the Academy is probably not an option for you at the moment,” Luke continued. “But if you would consider sitting in on some of our lessons and maybe trying one or two of them out…well, who knows?”

“I don’t know…” Lilliya shook her head, feeling very lost, confused, unprepared, and not in her realm at all.

Luke’s expression grew very solemn. “Look, Lilliya,” he said quietly. “I know what you’ve been through. I know how you must be feeling right now. Maybe this would be good for you. I don’t know what will happen today or tomorrow, but…what else…do you have?”

Lilliya’s diamond scar turned a dark green and she made herself shove away the flood of tears that threatened her. So this was why she was here. To give her something to do, to make her feel useful. And why not? She didn’t have anything or anybody anymore. She was a lost soul. A nobody. And he was right. They were all right. She had nothing left.

The rims around her eyes burned red as she fought back tears.

“There’s a data pad on the desk that’ll help you get to know the area and also has the training schedules logged into it, in case you change your mind,” Luke said. “In the meantime, we will be investigating the incident at Endor and will be asking you some questions that could help us. Right now, the TwinSuns squadron is on their way to the system. We should hear from them in a few days with an update.”

Lilliya nodded, not meeting Luke’s prominent gaze.

Luke frowned sadly, knowing how awful she must have been feeling. He wanted to hold her and comfort her, but something pushed him away. He still couldn’t sense her presence, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t see her fighting back the tears. And yet, Luke could feel something else emanating from her. It was like warm liquid and the closer he got to her, the more it flowed over him like an intoxicating drug. This unnerved him. He had never felt this sensation coming from someone before, and especially someone who’s life signs didn’t exist in the Force. What worried him more was that no one else mentioned the warmth he felt radiating off of Lilliya. Leia mentioned she felt like she was being pushed away from her. So did Jaina, but the feeling wasn’t so strong. Ben said he couldn’t get a sense out of her at all, but that she reminded him of the ysalimiri, the species that strangely blocked the Force from reaching anyone who stood nearby.

Luke, however, felt a mixture of things, one of which was the warming sensation, and one that also matched everyone else’s description. To him, she resembled a light that seemed devoid of life. Not unlike the Jedi Temple and its glowing metal skin. Like she had the aura, but lacked the soul.

Luke noticed Lilliya fidgeting and decided he’d better leave her be.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said. “Whether you decide to join us in training or not. Get some rest and things we’ll start to shape up quicker than you think.”

Lilliya watched Luke go and continued to stare at the door even when it slid closed. All she knew was that her life had ended. She didn’t know the one she was leading now.

1970 Reviews

Intro-

A little over a year ago, I had the sudden urge to watch every science fiction feature film starting from 1970 to now in order. Being already a sci-fi nerd, I wanted to see which era had the most interesting and imaginative sci-fi stories, and I was also intrigued by the changing and developing special effects throughout each decade. I, now, have finally reached the millennium era, but it’s not over yet! As I had gone throughout the years, I know that I had missed some. Sooner or later, I will go back to the years and cover the ones I missed.

I will keep my reviews in order by year and will include a brief analysis on story, special effects, acting, and direction.

1970
 

 

Beneath the Planet of the Apes

Director, Ted Post

Intriguing plotline, though it goes a little cooky with the futuristic, mind reading, evolved humans. It would have been more interesting if the story continued with Taylor’s journey to find the last remnants of human civilization. Lacks the strong direction of the first movie, Planet of the Apes. The general feel of the film is claustrophobic and not in a purposeful way. It feels stagnant and has plenty of room to grow. Special effects lack any purpose and the acting is dead. I rate it a D+.

1971
 

 

The Andromeda Strain

Director, Robert Wise

Fantastic story! Keeps you engulfed all the way from beginning to end. Little special effects, but wisely used. Doesn’t need too much of it to keep you into the story. Acting is strong and direction is solid. I rate it a B+.

Omega Man

Director, Boris Sagal; Starring Charlton Heston

Oh, please! Watching this drunk might have made this sadly serious film into a comedy. The story is interesting only because it’s the film version of the novel I Am Legend. The new movie with Will Smith was a remake of Omega Man, a remake that was smartly chosen. The disco-ish style of the music adds to the horribleness of the film. The direction is weak, and although Charlton Heston’s acting is his usual style, it doesn’t help the movie at all! All in all, I grade it a D.

THX 1138

Director, George Lucas; Starring, Robert Duvall

Though the story is a little slow, it has a great concept. It is ahead of its time, definitely unlike the typical 70s film style. This is one of Lucas’ first films and is really well-done. The direction is very good and the film is filled with very well-known actors. The action picks up near the middle of the film and continues to keep you hooked. The story itself is very complex and deep, and when the film ends, you’re left a little lost in your own thoughts and assumptions. I give it a B+.

1972
 

 

Silent Running

Director, Douglas Trumbull

Awful special effects, which is interesting because a number of people who worked on 2001: A Space Odyssey also worked on this film. The story could have been improved upon, the direction was poor, and the acting was way too 70s-cheesy to make it believable that it was far into the future. The main character was like a hippy-in-space type of guy who’s best friends were little robot units (very R2-D2-like) and talked to plants. Boring and dull and a waste of film. Grade D.

1973
 

 

Soylent Green

Director, Richard Fleischer; Starring Charlton Heston

Cult film with imaginative storyline. Acting is well-done and direction is strong. However, as much as I respect the concept of this film, I vote for this being one of the chosen to be remade. It needs a lot of help in the futuristic-concept department and music score department. It reeks of 70s and isn’t believable that this kind of a world would be what the future would look like. Grade C+.

1974
 

 

Dark Star

Director, John Carpenter

This might have been Carpenter’s first attempt at science fiction, but, boy, does it suck. I could barely get through the movie without skipping forward in hopes that there was anything interesting. It was so bad that I barely remember the plot, being that the plot was also so vague and directionless I found myself wondering what the point of it all was. Another horribly, pointless claustrophobic film. It had the potential to be a good story—oh wait, I take it back. Not really. Grade F.

Flesh Gordon

Director, Michael Benveniste and Howard Ziehm

A soft-porn spoof off of the classic Flash Gordon serials. Of course, I’m gonna say it had a great storyline if only because it was based off the original Flash Gordon. However, the acting, directing, and special effects (very reminiscent of Ray Harryhausen’s stop-motion style) was all bad, bad, bad. Then again, if you’re in the mood for a comedic porno that’s more interesting than your typical vagina flick, I suggest this movie. It’ll get the job done and keep you interested in the plot at the same time! Science fiction grade F; porno grade A.

1975
 

 

Rollerball

Director, Norman Jewison; Starring James Caan

Though there were yawn-moments in this film, the story is very smart and original that you stay loyal until the end. The acting, especially with James Caan (your early 1970s Harrison Ford) leading the way, was very strong and believable. The direction was good and even the cinematography was creatively artistic. You do have to push through those lagging moments, however, but in the end, you feel satisfied with the film. Grade B-.

1976
 

 

Logan’s Run

Director, Michael Anderson; Starring Michael York

Fabulous film! Very long, but very engaging. The story is topnotch original and entertaining. This movie starts off on a league of its own and hooks you to the end. The recent film The Island has a lot of parallels with Logan’s Run and I wouldn’t be surprised if the writer for The Island got most of his ideas from this movie. Acting and directing is great. The only problem I have with the film is the special effects. Even for a 70s film, it could have had way better graphics. I would like to see this movie remade, but only if the concept team was topnotch. Grade A.

1977
 

 

Close Encounters of the Third Kind

Director, Steven Spielburg; Starring Richard Dreyfuss

Enter Spielburg! Coming right behind Lucas with his first science fiction film that was to compete against Lucas’ Star Wars. This story makes aliens the nice guys and keeps you engaged till the end. Not a boring moment! Music by John Williams, so you have a fabulous score. Acting is topnotch, led by Richard Dreyfuss. And direction is, of course, flawless. Grade A.

Star Wars

Director, George Lucas

So Lucas takes the spotlight in 1977 by blowing away billions in the theater. The story captivates audiences and continues to do so throughout generations. Though the story, direction and acting are not without it subtle flaws, it remains legendary. The special effects are first-rate and started the CGI growing trend. This movie gets an A+.

1978
 

 

Starcrash

Director, Luigi Cozzi; Starring David Hasselhoff and Christopher Plummer

Though this movie seems to have an all-star cast, it’s as bad as a rotten egg. The special effects was like watching cartoon animation around live-action. That worked in the famous film Roger Rabbit, but please, spare us of Starcrash! Grade F.

1979
 

 

Alien

Director, Ridley Scott

Another phenomenal film, story rich with elegance and space horror. Acting at its best, of course it should be with an all-star cast. Direction is flawless. Cinematography and music is so masterfully coordinated, you feel what the characters feel. Special effects is also at its best. There isn’t one flaw with this film as it takes the top of science fiction films of the 70s. Grade A++.

Mad Max

Director, George Miller; Starring Mel Gibson

A fantastic movie based in the post-apocalyptic era. Though it is an independent film, it escalated a whole franchise and cult-following with Gibson as the lead. The story is original and well-crafted. There isn’t really any special effects, if you don’t count the action-packed sequences between cars and motorcycles riding each other off. Tremendous film without a boring moment. Grade A-.

The Black Hole

Director, Gary Nelson

Uh, oh. Here comes Disney with their own science fiction film. Look out! This movie is riddled with awfulness. Grade D.

Moonraker

Director, Lewis Gilbert; Starring Roger Moore

Sci-fi being the top competitor! Well, James Bond can go to space too! Pretty self-explanatory…Grade C.

Star Trek: The Motion Picture

Director, Robert Wise

Since Star Wars came out, Paramount wanted to bring back Star Trek. Though the film inspired a massive franchise including continuous television series and decades of other films, the first of the first wasn’t so great. The loyalest of fans could barely get through this film without yawning. The movie focused most of its attention special effects rather than the story, which is, in my opinion, a huge mistake! Scene after scene, you have to sit through slow panning of visual effects and the showing of the Enterprise to the point where you wanna say “I get it already!”. Grade C+.

~~~

 

Out of all the science fiction films of the 70s, Ridley Scott’s Alien was the most creative, emotionally engaging, and artistically enhanced film of that decade. It stands out with its original story and concept, accompanied by the superb acting and talented directing, along with its top-of-the-line special effects.

Love, stuff, and other things of a whimsical nature.

There isn’t a lot of things that surprise me. Furthermore, I rarely surprise myself. However, I think it’s safe to say that I’ve surprised myself a hell of a lot more often in the past few months than I ever have in the past.

I’ve always found myself adamantly studying human behavior and the reasons behind their actions. In the same way, I also study myself and once

...your best friend?
...your best friend?

in a while, I am astounded by what I’ve done or how I’ve reacted.

I’ve already written a few articles on the changes that have occurred over the semester and the adventures that have been experienced. I have lightly touched on this subject, but I have not really elaborated enough. So I’ll ask: what drives a person to do things outside their nature? Nature being the operative, or rather meaning a person’s predictable personality.

It’s easy to agree that people have the ability to do things they normally wouldn’t do, when all reason and logic disappear and pure animalistic instincts take over. Being such a highly evolved species—that is, most of us—are able to control our “wild” instincts. But what is it that wills us to make a conscious decision to let that all go?

I used to be a virgin. I used to want to wait until marriage, to save it for the man I would spend the rest of my life with, your typical romantic ideal. I was a virgin up until I was 22. Not a bad record, I have to say. During that time, I was also in a serious relationship with another virgin, which made it less of a temptation to let loose on our physical desires. However, I had the urge to know whether or not I was sex-worthy to my boyfriend. I would ask once in a while if he ever wanted to make love to me. Ironically, he would get irritated and say “no, not right now.” I think he took me literally, whereas I just wanted the satisfaction of knowing that he would if he wanted to. After the sixth month of our relationship, his mind changed, a full turnaround. Suddenly, he was all for it. And I gave away myself to the one I thought was “true love.” At 22, I was super naïve. That boy was the only boy I had ever been with, even past our eventual terminated relationship.

Until now…

Now the count is two. Two at 24.

After my breakup, I wanted to try and wait again until marriage. I didn’t want to run amok and sleep with any guy that was willing, even though there were times the opportunity was extremely tempting. I wanted to keep the sex thing something special between me and someone else. Something meaningful. Worthwhile. Not just a physical exercise to get my jollies off. I want to do it for love. Is that so surprising?

So, while I was doing my best to revirginize myself, I developed a very close friendship with a boy. He became my best friend. He was amazing in every way, a Godsend, really. He and I were pretty much welded at the hip. He was 22 and also a virgin.

Our friendship was picked on by most people, behind our backs or to our faces. People at work pressured and gossiped. Close friends disapproved and also gossiped. Most didn’t believe we could be “just friends.” It was hard to a point. Emotionally hard. For my best friend had also fallen for me. I, however, couldn’t see him more than just a friend. Perhaps it was because that’s how I started out, looking at him as though he were a brother of mine.

But we were the opposite sex. And there were times where the attraction could become very hard to ignore. There were little moments where we did allow ourselves physical exploration, but it never led to much of anything else. Our code term was “stuff and other things.”

“I’m in the mood for doing stuff,” I’d say.

“And other things?” he’d respond. We’d laugh at our little inside joke.

But one fateful night, I gave in. I slept with my best friend. All logical reasoning flew out the door, all consideration for our friendship—gone. Just simple and pure, straightforward and relentless, human instinct. For a night, my reservations on sex vanished. I guess you could say my need was much stronger than I thought. There was no regret, which mildly surprises me. I used to regret it before.

Also, I find it ironic that I’ve only slept with virgins… Kinda makes me feel like I’m a thief of innocence.

Nonetheless, how can I explain myself? What was it that drove me to give in after all those months of being able to thwart off physical passion? How did I turn from a person who so believed strongly in waiting, to becoming who I am now? It cannot be explained off by simply saying “I changed my mind.” There’s more to it. Was it love that I felt for my best friend? Did I finally see past the idea that he was “just a friend?” Or was it loneliness? I’d have to say no on that one. There were a few other guys I could have been with out of loneliness, but chose not to. Was it simply out of passion? Again, I’d have to say no. I would have taken it out on guys a lot sooner, if that was the case.

Then it was love. It had to have been. I had already known how deeply I felt for him, that I wanted nothing but his happiness. I wanted nothing but for him to know what love was like. Robin Williams in Bicentennial Man states it perfectly:

 

“That you can lose yourself, everything, all boundaries, all time—the two bodies can become so mixed up that you don’t know who’s who or what’s what. And just when the sweet confusion is so intense you think you’re gonna DIE, you kind of do…leaving you alone in your separate body.

 

But the one you love is still there.

 

That’s a miracle. You can go to heaven and come back alive. You can go back anytime you want with the one you love.”

 

Was it really so wrong of us to do? I don’t think so.

So, even though I promised myself to wait—even though I believe making love is special and shouldn’t be wasted—even though I wasn’t in a romantic relationship with him—even though there are those who may think I’m a horrible person for giving in and sleeping with my best friend, accusing me of knowing better and putting all responsibilities on my shoulders—even though I did something outside of my own personal nature—I know that I am happy. Maybe because I knew he was happy. After all, showing love is giving love.

And…

…stuff and other things.

The Revolution: Chapter 6 part 3

The night air was cooler than usual for Coruscant’s summer. The two suns had already disappeared far below the horizon, shrouding the city into a sparkling night. There was a gray haze in the sky, hiding the stars, but the city contained its own light. Fireworks, parades, and other lighting spectaculars lit up the night sky, reflecting off skyscrapers’ silver metal skin. Every spire was lit from the inside with blue, gold, yellow, and red.

The Galactic Palace had an array of colorful laser lights surrounding the base. The colors bent, twirled, and made shapes in the dark sky’s gray haze. The city echoed with sounds of all kinds, the palace being the main center of attraction. People from all over the galaxy traveled to see the palace on YVA day. Security had their hands full as they scanned every person before entering the palace and into the massive Crystal Ballroom. The ballroom had a live band playing New Republic classics that people danced to in the center of the room. Surrounding the dance floor were circular tables elaborately decorated with ice-mist sculptures that changed shape when no one was looking. The room was packed to the brim with delegates from all over, politicians, bureaucrats, celebrities, wealthy citizens, high military officials, ambassadors, and even some celebrated pilots who were graciously invited and decided to make an appearance.

Lilliya felt incredibly overwhelmed as soon as she stepped through the immense crystal doors and into the Crystal Ballroom. She could feel the eyes of all the people looking in her direction, probably because of her intimidating escort, the GP guard droids, looking very out of place in a room full of organics. Or maybe it was the gown she wore given to her by Jaina. A gown that Lilliya felt particularly exposed in and that drew too much attention to her figure. Her hair cascaded in curls down her back and the white satin dress, embedded with tiny little crystals, flowed down her body, clinging to all the right places. The low cut front and back made her feel too self-conscious. She wondered wryly to herself if this was punishment for something she did in an earlier life.

Lilliya shrank into the crowds, searching for anyone she might recognize. The GP droids stayed very close to her, which made the groupings of people part out of her way. She could hear them whispering about her. One of her many talents was her hearing, but at this particular moment, she didn’t want to hear what they were saying. Some were curious, others were jealous, and some were nervously backing away because of her escort.

After maneuvering through the crowds, it seemed impossible that she might find someone she knew. She was hoping Jaina would be easy to spot, the only person she felt remotely comfortable with.

She stopped near a group of high-class Calamarians and surveyed the room. There were too many people and Lilliya was thinking she’d rather go back to her apartment. If she couldn’t find anyone, then there was no point in her being there.

As she stood there looking through all the people, she had the strangest feeling she was being watched. She listened closely to the murmuring around her, but no one was paying attention to her anymore. The droids, of course, were watching her every move, but she could have sworn she felt something else too. A shiver ran up her spin as she became more and more aware of a pair of eyes peering at her from across the room.

Lilliya turned slowly to her left, saw a tall, blue Chiss glance in her direction, but then disappear onto the dance floor. It wasn’t the Chiss who caught Lilliya’s eye, however; it was the man standing behind the Chiss.

There was a man in simple black formal attire standing alone on the far side of the room. He had dark hair with a shock of white above each ear, a sinewy figure, chiseled jaw, and deep, glistening blue eyes. Even meters away, Lilliya could tell they were blue.

And he was staring right at her. His gaze didn’t even flinch when she looked right back. It was as if he knew her from somewhere. In that moment, Lilliya felt the world melt away. The bright colors blended together in a swirling mesh, the movement of the people slowed and mixed with the colors, and everything went silent. The only thing Lilliya could feel or hear was her heartbeat as her breath caught in her throat. She couldn’t explain her reaction, only that she didn’t know if it was fear she was feeling, shock, or wonderment. His eyes never left hers. She couldn’t move—couldn’t look away, though her mind was telling her to run.

“Lilliya!” Someone shouted her name, but it sounded too far away. Suddenly, a cool hand grabbed her arm and pulled her at her.

“Lilliya, I’m so glad you decided to come,” Jaina shouted through the loud music, a wide grin spread across her angelic face.

Everything went spinning back up to speed as Lilliya broke her gaze from the stranger.

“Yeah, better late than never,” Lilliya murmured, allowing herself a weak smile. She glanced back to where the man was, but he had already disappeared. She felt very uneasy now.

“I knew that dress would look great on you,” Jaina smiled wryly. “I know I could never pull it off. Come with me!” Jaina picked up the train of her blue silk dress and held onto Lilliya’s hand as Jaina pulled her through the crowds. The GP droids were somehow able to keep up. Jaina and Lilliya met up with a much more casual-looking group, all about the same age.

“This is my squad: Gavin, Kenalle, Bayley, and Wess,” Jaina said, introducing the four very tall and muscular men, all human except for Bayley. He was a yellow-skinned Andrian. They all grinned handsomely at Lilliya, Wess not hiding is obvious approval. “And this is my cousin, Ben,” she said, turning to the last man in the group.

Ben turned around to shake Lilliya’s hand, but then stopped himself when he recognized who it was. Lilliya, too, stopped herself and they both stared at each other awkwardly.

“We’ve met,” Ben said, his voice gruff. But he couldn’t help notice how stunning Lilliya looked. The crystal necklace caught his eye as it glittered against her near-bare chest and he had to concentrate on looking away.

“Yes,” Lilliya blushed. “Earlier today…we ran into each other, sort of.”

Ben grumbled something unintelligible and looked away.

“Oh,” Jaina said, giving Ben a sideways look. “Well, now you can meet again.”

“So we hear you’re a pilot for the Galactic Raiders,” the older man named Gavin said.

“Yes, I was,” Lilliya nodded. So it begins… “Or rather I am the last remaining Raider pilot.”

“Yes, we’re very sorry to hear about that,” Gavin said, and it sounded like he meant it. “We’re shipping out early tomorrow morning actually to find out what’s been going on over there. This is the first real disturbance we’ve had in years.”

“Let’s hope that’s all it’ll be,” Kenalle said to Gavin.

“Yeah, just a nuisance,” Wess piped in. “Though I’ve been aching for a little action. Patrolling the galaxy can get a little old, you know?” He winked at Lilliya. She pretended not to notice.

“I’m sure.” Jaina rolled her eyes.

“Lilliya,” another voice called in her direction. She recognized this voice as Leia’s. “I’m glad you’ve decided to join us.” Leia joined the little group of pilots, a gold gown clinging to her small frame and flowing far behind her. A man Lilliya didn’t recognize stood at her side and another entourage of droids stood a few more paces away from her. These weren’t the same droids, however; they were the HD organic droids. They were even more disturbing looking than the metal GP guard droids, despite their lifelike appearance.

Lilliya nodded a greeting. She was happy to find that Leia seemed to be in a much better mood this time.

“This is my husband, Han Solo,” Leia said, introducing the man at her side. He was very ruggishly handsome and looked more like a rouge than a president’s partner. He nodded and grinned a dashingly crooked grin at Lilliya.

“Something looks different about you,” Leia said, examining Lilliya’s face. “Did you dye your hair?”

Lilliya frowned in confusion, but then remembered that her hair did change color. But it always did when the sunrays didn’t shine on her. For some strange reason that had never been explained, Lilliya’s hair color would depend on the sun. During the day, her hair would be a golden blonde. At night, her hair would turn, not gray or white, but a lustrous silver. She was so used to it changing without explaining the strange occurrence, she had completely forgotten about it. It was another thing her father told her not to worry about, that she was unique and should feel lucky to have changing hair color…

“Oh, no,” Lilliya answered. “I have a weird hair pigmentation problem that is heavily affected by sunrays.” Let’s see if they buy that story…“That is weird,” Jaina said. “I didn’t even notice until you said something, Mom.”

Everyone was examining her, Jaina and Leia especially, and Ben seemed to sneak angry glances in her direction, his blue eyes very accusing. Lilliya was beginning to wonder why Ben acted so strangely toward her. He couldn’t have been still angry about her “breaking and entering” his house?

“So I hear you’re going off to Endor tomorrow,” Leia said, turning her attention to Jaina. “I’m a little surprised you didn’t run it by me.”

“You want someone to check out the system, don’t you?” Jaina said, irritation quickly filtering into her tone. It was obvious they had a similar discussion earlier.

“Yes, of course, but I’m not sure I want you going out there just yet.”

“Well, I think my squad could handle it better than any of your other teams the Alliance has,” Jaina said, keeping her voice calm.

“Leia,” Gavin said, and Lilliya was surprised he addressed her so informally. “If there is something dangerous out there, we should be the first group to investigate. You already lost one team. You know what our specialty is…and I can promise you we’ll bring your daughter back safely.” Gavin smiled, knowing that that was Leia’s main concern.

Leia kept a pleasant smile on her face, but her dark eyes were saying something else. “Thank you, Gavin. But I’d still rather send Squad 9 out before—”

“Mom!” Jaina interjected, already losing her cool.

“Listen to you mother, Jaina,” Han said, this being the first time Lilliya heard him speak. His voice was low and coarse.

Instead, Jaina spoke before Leia could. “Couldn’t we discuss this later,” Jaina said, gritting her teeth and her brown eyes glistening stubbornly at her mother.

Leia closed her mouth and seemed to agree with her daughter. “Later, then,” she said. Then she turned to Lilliya. “So, were you able to meet any of the squadron generals, yet?”

“Not really,” Lilliya answered, a little wary of the tension between Jaina and Leia. “I kind of just got here.”

“And what would be the fun of looking for a job when you’re supposed to be enjoying yourself?” Another person joined the group, surprising even Gavin and Han. It was a man this time with a deep, gentle voice.

“Ah, Luke, there you are,” Leia said, smiling brightly.

Lilliya turned to see who it was standing behind her and she caught her breath. It was the same man in black, the one who was staring at her from across the room. Now that he was closer, she felt like panicking.

The man named Luke stepped up right beside her, but didn’t glance in her direction.

“Lilliya,” Leia said, “this is my brother Luke Skywalker.”

Luke turned his perceptive blue eyes onto to Lilliya now and smiled warmly.

“I’ve been looking forward to meeting you,” he said. “Leia’s told me so much about you.”

Lilliya’s glance flickered between Leia and Luke, as the shock began to seep in. This was Luke Skywalker, probably the most famous and well-known person in the entire galaxy. And Leia was speaking of her to him. Maybe that would explain the reason he was staring at her before. She then was beginning to wonder if Luke and Ben were related, but when she turned to look for him within the group, she noticed he’d gone.

“Luke! You better find time to come out with me before you leave for Ossus,” Han said, slapping him on the shoulder. Han was much taller than Luke, making the Jedi Master look quite small in comparison. “You owe me one, buddy.”

Luke laughed. “That I do. But it might have to wait for another night. I leave for Ossus early tomorrow morning.”

“We’ll see about that,” Han said. “Looks like I’ll have to send Threepio to disable you’re ship. You are staying here.”

“I don’t think his metal brain could handle sabotaging a Skywalker ship,” Luke said. “I have a feeling my father had him programmed that way from the beginning.”

The music suddenly changed to a slower waltz and many more people joined the dance floor.

“Well, since Luke doesn’t want to spend time with his old friend,” Han smirked, then turned to his daughter, “Jaina should dance with her father—you know, to help me plan a different attack.”

“Oh, Dad…” Jaina grumbled, rolling her eyes, but allowed Han to dramatically swing her onto the dance floor.

“Mistress Leia,” Gavin said, humor rolling off his tone. “Would you be so kind as to have this dance.”

“Why of course, Gavin,” Leia smiled wryly. “I would be honored.” The two of them entered the dance floor while the HDs stood aside, watching.

Lilliya was left with the other pilots and Luke, making her feel very awkward. She hoped no one was planning on asking her to dance. As far as she knew, she had two left feet.

“Lilliya.”

She grimaced, feeling it coming, and not wanting to look up from the floor.

“Come and dance with me.” It was Luke’s voice, she knew it. So she forced herself to look up in response, if only to be polite, and met Luke’s glistening blue eyes. Again, she shivered.

Lilliya forced a smile and shook her head no. “I don’t know how,” she said meekly.

Luke smiled wide and suddenly his hand was upon hers, a warm, firm grasp. “Nonsense,” he said, and his voice was like silk. Before she could object, he pulled her onto the dance floor along with everyone else, and she could have sworn she heard the other pilots snickering.

As soon as they found a big enough clearing on the floor for the two of them, Luke stopped and turned toward her. Lilliya was in too much shock to really know what to do, so Luke bent down and picked up the train of her gown, placing it gently in her right hand.

“You may want to hold on to this,” he said, his voice so soft it nearly put Lilliya in a trance, if she wasn’t in one already. Luke then placed her left hand in his, pressed his other hand against the small of her bare back, his fingers sending thrilling waves up her skin, and pulled her to him.

Lilliya had to concentrate on not shuddering as every nerve-ending in her body seemed to be firing sporadically all over. She had never felt this way, nor had anyone ever come close to affecting her like this. There seemed to be no explanation for it either.

The two of them began moving to the waltz, slowly at first, and then more up to speed once Lilliya felt more confident.

Finally, she was able to recover her voice. “This isn’t really my area of expertise,” she said, trying to hide the shy quiver in her tone.

“It isn’t mine either,” Luke said, smiling kindly. “But don’t worry, I’ve got you.”

Lilliya allowed a little nervous laugh to escape. She figured that comment might have had a double meaning.

“So you’re the daughter of Admiral Tentle?” Luke asked.

Lilliya nodded, trying not to think about it.

“I think I met him once,” Luke said, his voice soothing. “He was a good man and a good leader.”

“Yes…” Lilliya said, her voice barely a whisper. “He was.”

“If I remember it correctly,” Luke continued, “he didn’t have any other children.”

“No,” Lilliya responded. “My mother died when I was very young and he never remarried. I suppose he was too busy bringing up a stubborn little girl like me.”

Luke smiled again, and Lilliya was enchanted by it. It was strange that the feeling of fear she felt before now seemed a distant memory, as though it had melted away and reformed into a bizarre attraction. Despite the age difference, Lilliya found herself oddly drawn to the Jedi Master. There was a magnetic desirability she sensed but couldn’t describe.

Lilliya forgot she was holding her breath and forced herself to let it out slowly, all the while knowing other people were watching them intently, especially the young TwinSuns pilots.

“Do you have any other family?” Luke spoke again, his breath warm and inviting, caressing her mouth.

Lilliya blinked, hoping she heard what he said. She had lost her concentration just a minute ago and all she could think of was the hot pulsing she felt deep inside her. He was so close, she could barely breathe, and his blue eyes were looking at her with such fierce intensity that she was getting dizzy just looking back.

“What?” Lilliya mumbled. She could have sworn she felt something burning against her chest, but couldn’t seem to tear her eyes away from Luke’s to check what it was.

As if reading her mind, Luke glanced down and frowned.

“That’s an interesting crystal,” he said, his gaze glancing back up at her.

Lilliya looked down too and frowned as well. Her crystal charm was glowing brightly against her sternum. That must have been the heat she was noticing. She knew her crystal glowed from time to time, but they were rare and always seemed to signal something coming—usually danger. Suddenly she wasn’t feeling so good.

Without really aware of what she was doing, Lilliya leaned into Luke and laid her head against his shoulder.

Luke tensed in surprise. “Are you okay?” he asked.

Lilliya squeezed her eyes shut to stop the spinning. The whole room was swirling in a sickening, dizzying mess. She hoped it wasn’t her concussion. The MD droid told her she’d be fine.

“I don’t think I feel so good…” Lilliya moaned, trying to work moisture into her mouth.

Luke’s grip tightened on her if only to keep her from falling to the ground. Suddenly, he felt her whole body weigh onto him, her hand going slack in his, and she collapsed, her head snapping backward.

Luke heard the people watching gasp in surprise. He balanced his body with hers, placed his hand behind her neck in support, and lifted her into his arms. Leia, Jaina, and Han were already there at his side. He saw the other pilots pushing their way towards them as well.

“What happened?” Leia said, a little astounded.

Luke shook his head. “I’m not sure.”

“Maybe she’s exhausted,” Jaina said. “She’s had a rough couple of days.”

“Could be the concussion,” Leia wondered.

“Or maybe Luke was a little too hot for her to handle,” Han smirked, winking at Luke. “You’ve got a blonde-bombshell in your arms, kid. That doesn’t happen every day—”

Leia punched him in the arm and Luke rolled his eyes. A crowd of curious people began to gather around them.

“Well, if anything, someone should get her back to her room,” Leia said.

“I’ll do it!” Both Wess and Kenalle exclaimed fervently.

Right,” Jaina said, pushing them both back. “I’ll take her back. I’ve had my fill of the party anyhow.” She turned to look for the GP guard droids, but they were already on their way. The first one reached Luke and he slid the unconscious Lilliya into its massive, bulky arms. Jaina followed the droids out of the Crystal Ballroom, random people cheering sarcastically as they left.

Leia looked at Luke, a worried expression on her elegant face.

Luke’s expression was a grim mix of confusion and worry, his eyes staring at the floor.

“I’m not sure what happened,” he finally said.

“Maybe she really is still sick,” Han pointed out.

Luke shook his head, but didn’t say anything. People were watching them and that was making him more aggravated.

“Were you able to detect her?” Leia asked. “Or at least figure out what she is.”

Luke’s expression grew darker. “I don’t want to talk about,” he said, then suddenly stormed off into the crowds.

Leia’s mouth dropped in confusion as she watched him disappear.

“What was that all about?” Han said, a little irritated at Luke for leaving them so abruptly.

“That was weird,” Gavin said, and the other TwinSuns pilots standing by him agreed. “And where’s Ben? He just up and disappeared earlier too.”

Leia was still staring where Luke left off, her brow furrowing in concern.

“There’s a lot of weird things going on,” Han grumbled. “Remember what I said about wanting a little adventure? Well, I take it back.”

***

 

Lilliya woke up in utter darkness. Her hands felt around the soft cushion she laid on and assumed she was most likely on a bed.

“Lights,” she said, and the room lit up immediately. She winced at the brightness and shaded her eyes. She realized she was back in her bedroom, still dressed in the white gown Jaina had given her. She couldn’t really remember what happened or how she got there, but her sternum felt sore. Lilliya glanced down and noticed a tender red spot in the shape of a tiny oblong object—her crystal. But it wasn’t glowing anymore. She fingered the crystal lightly and noticed it was cold.

Rubbing her eyes, irritated from the bright light, she said, “Lights dim, shades off.” The lights dimmed down to a soft glow and the windows went from opaque to clear, allowing more city light to glitter against the bedroom walls. It was still night.

Someone must have placed her in the room and activated the window shades. Lilliya didn’t remember doing any of it.

It was then she noticed a steel black box laying next to her on the bed. Cocking her head to the side in curiosity, she picked up the box—it was heavy and cold—and placed it carefully in front of her. There was an old New Republic emblem engraved on the cover of the box. She recognized it as her father’s private safe.

Lilliya held her breath as she realized this must have been restored from the Raider base. At the moment, she didn’t seem to care how it got in her room or how it was able to be sent from Endor to Coruscant.

Her fingers traced the outside of the box lightly until she found the latch to unlock it. Inside, she found her father’s personal documents, a few expensive credit chips, a carbon photo of her and her mom—that made her stop for a second. She held the photo in her fingers, peering at it in the dim illumination, the city lights twinkling against it. Her mother was young and beautiful holding a five year old girl with long curly gold hair. The two women in the photo were laughing.

“Aw, Dad…” Lilliya murmured, absentmindedly brushing a tear from her cheek. She placed the carbon photo on the bed and continued searching through the box. She came upon a smaller case, only a couple inches wide, and opened it. It was black velvet inside and was mainly empty except for a tiny silver, rectangular object. Lilliya frowned, marveling at the thin metal, carefully picking it up with her fingers. It was only about a centimeter long, very small. There was a hook attached to it as if it could be attached to a chain of some sort. She rotated it letting the dim light reflect off of it softly. She thought she saw something written on it.

As she peered closer, she did indeed see a script of some kind, but it was in a language she didn’t recognize. She thought of Jenar, wishing he was with her. He would have been able to translate it. She smiled wryly to herself remembering their little conversation about the point of learning more than five languages…

And then she stopped herself from thinking any further. Blinking the burning tears away, tears she hadn’t even noticed building, she carelessly balanced the metal charm on her finger. Then, without giving it much thought, she hooked the piece of metal onto her necklace, letting it clink against her crystal.

Lilliya piled everything back into the metal safe, locked it, and placed it on the floor next to her bed. She stripped off her dress and buried herself into the covers.

“Lights off,” she grumbled as she threw a satin pillow over her head. The lights immediately plunged the room in darkness, only the city lights making soft, glowing orb-like shapes against the bedroom walls, and Lilliya willed sleep to take her.

The Revolution: Chapter 6 part 2

Lilliya was a little lost. She knew she took one of the lifts when she left the gardens, and it shot further up the palace till she reached the top. Now she was in a much more elaborate and lavish corridor with more wide windows looking out towards Coruscant’s cityscape. Noting the expensive looking décor, she assumed she must have ventured into a much more wealthy living area.
Rather than returning back down to the lower levels, Lilliya was compelled to explore the richer apartments. She found herself wandering down the brightly lit hallways until she reached the end. She was about to turn back around, but the apartment at the end of the hall had its door wide open. Lilliya cocked her head to the side in curiosity. Who would leave their door open, she wondered.
She stood alone in the hallway; there wasn’t much traffic up in the higher lofts compared to the lower ones. In fact, the hallway she stood in was completely empty. Lilliya waited to see if someone would come out of the apartment and close the door. She couldn’t explain why she cared, but she had the itching feeling to explore inside. She moved closer to the open door, trying to make her walk look casual just in case someone decided to show up.
“Hello?” she called into the apartment, barely leaning in an inch.
No answer.
“I noticed your door was open…” she called again, a little more timidly this time. Still, nothing. Lilliya glanced behind her to see if anyone was coming, then slinked into the entrance. She held her breath as she went through.
There was nothing really spectacular on the inside other than the vast amount of living space. Lilliya descended down a few steps into the circular living area. Everything was very clean, almost untouched. The room had a spectacular view of the city and Lilliya found herself staring out the window for a few minutes. In the corner of the room, the sunlight glinted off something silvery. More curious than ever, she turned to where the reflection came from.
A silver object stood elevated on one of the mantels by the holovid projector. It was oblong and obviously made out of a silver metal material. It floated in the air and must have been held up by a type of magnetic field. Lilliya thought she recognized the object as she got closer. Carefully, she wrapped her fingers around its cylindrical shape and pulled it away from the magnetic field. It was surprisingly heavy in her hand for how simple it was, and very cold, though the room temperature wasn’t any colder.
Gripping it tighter, for fear of dropping it, she noticed a small knob on its side. She touched it.
Suddenly, the object came to life. A deep blue laser-blade shot out of the topside of the cylinder, humming and vibrating loudly. Lilliya nearly dropped the thing in shock, but thankfully had a tight enough grip on it that her hands were shaking from the vibration.
And she knew exactly what it was.
Her heart began to race as she quickly began to realize who’s room she was in, but before she could plan her hasty escape, the lightsaber was yanked out of her hand by some unseen force, the blade disappearing back into the hilt, and landing in the hand of a man.
Lilliya swore under her breath as she slowly turned around to face whoever was behind her. There stood a young man, probably in his early twenties, with dark blonde hair that seemed to shimmer with red in the sunlight, deep blue eyes shaded by thick, curled lashes, a straight nose and chiseled jaw, rosebud-shaped lips that were definitely curved into a frown. He wore a blue flight suit, academy rank, Lilliya recognized, black gloves and black knee-high boots. The man hooked the lightsaber onto his utility belt.
He was very good-looking, and very irritated.
“What are you doing?” he said, his voice deep and annoyed.
Lie! Lie! Think of something!
“I didn’t realize the apartment was occupied,” Lilliya said, her voice shaking nervously. “I saw the door open and it didn’t seem like anyone lived here. Until I saw that.” She pointed at the lightsaber.
The man didn’t say anything, but his hand reflexively rested on the lightsaber’s hilt. He continued to stare at her, frustration becoming very obvious in his blue eyes. This made Lilliya even more nervous. Not only did Jedi and their mysterious power called the Force make Lilliya feel very vulnerable, but their mere presence made her uneasy.
Feeling frozen in place, Lilliya stared back at the man, waiting for him to say something else. The two continued to stare at each other, not moving, as though two highly dangerous predators faced each other for the first time, not knowing what to do, whether they should attack or run.
Finally, he said, “This isn’t something to mess around with.” He gestured to his lightsaber.
Lilliya broke away from his blue-eyed stare for a second to glance at the silver hilt.
“I’m sorry about that,” she said, looking back up at him. His eyes were scrutinizing, almost invasive. It made her feel exposed. She could feel her cheeks warming. “I was curious…” She shrugged.
“You could have killed yourself,” he said, “if you don’t know what you’re doing.”
Lilliya nodded, glad to know that the man cared somewhat about her well-being. That was a good sign.
“Well,” she said, “it definitely won’t happen again. I’ll be going now.” As she side-stepped the man to leave the room, she noticed other figures in the door way.
“Mr. Skywalker,” a deep mechanical voice reverberated. Her GP guard droids now stood in the hallway, their glowing red eyes zeroing in on Lilliya.
“Oh, great,” she muttered.
Ben Skywalker glanced at the droids, the only non-organic droids allowed as legal by order of the Advisory Council, and then back down at the disgruntled girl. His feelings were a mixture of shock, anger, paranoia, and amazement. First, because he had no idea someone would be in his apartment. He had only been gone for a few minutes. Second, because he found someone intruding on his privacy and this “someone” was undetectable by the Force. Thirdly, because she couldn’t be detected, and that made him feel threatened by her. Fourthly, because she was not only beautiful, but fascinating to look at.
Her skin was a soft ivory color without a blemish or a freckle. Her hair was bright gold and curly past her shoulders. She was tall and slender, her curves perfectly proportioned. A sparkling crystal glittered in the sunlight and reflected against her breasts, which Ben didn’t fail to notice. Her lips were pink and full, and her face was of a gentle, elegant structure.
But it was her eyes that really caught Ben’s attention. Her right one was a sparkling, sapphire blue while the other was an emerald green. And within the green eye was a strange, diamond-shaped scar. When Ben stared at her, he saw the scar flash different colors, from light to dark. He’d never seen anything like it.
“Mr. Skywalker,” the main GP droid spoke again. “We apologize for the interruption, but we are ordered to escort Commander Lilliya Tentle back to her quarters.”
Ben cocked an eyebrow. He wondered why heavy duty military droids were assigned to someone like her. At least, she looked safe enough. Then again, she did have his lightsaber in hand. Who knows what she would have done with it?
“Who’s orders?” Ben asked.
“President Organa Solo,” it said.
Ben looked over at Lilliya curiously. He supposed he’d have to talk with his aunt Leia to get any answers about this strange girl.
“You‘re not an escaped convict or anything like that, are you?” Ben asked Lilliya, a hint of sarcasm in his voice.
“No,” Lilliya frowned.
“Well, then I guess you’d better go with them,” he said to Lilliya, a wry smile tugging at his lips.
A flash of disappointment crossed her face. Maybe she was hoping he’d get her out of the situation, but why would he do that after she’d just intruded on his home.
Lilliya’s shoulders slumped in defeat and shuffled to the waiting guard droids. Ben followed her out and watched her disappear down the corridor with her intimidating entourage.
Commander, he thought. Ben decided he would investigate this commander and talk with Leia. Maybe she couldn’t sense the girl either. He slightly hoped that was the case and that he wasn’t getting rusty with the Force. He would talk with Leia as soon as he cleaned up and showered. He had a very long and irritating day at the Academy. Perhaps it was because he was distracted when sensing his father’s presence arriving in Coruscant City. He was not looking forward to seeing his father today.
***
The door chimed, snapping Lilliya out of her bored daze. Evening was approaching and Coruscant’s two suns were sinking towards the horizon, shrouding everything into a deep red-gold. Lilliya had been laying on her bed, head resting off the edge and staring lazily out the wall-length window, everything upside down. She wasn’t allowed to leave her apartment without the guard droids following her every move. This time the droids used their sensors in case the room ever registered as empty, which made it pointless to try to escape at all.
So Lilliya tried to sleep away the day. When that didn’t work, she tried to entertain herself with the holovid. That lasted for about an hour before she turned it off. When she refused to go out for dinner if the droids had to follow her, dinner was sent to her. She ate it, but hated it. She didn’t understand why she had to be a prisoner when she only did her duty by warning the Galactic Alliance.
Lilliya, then, noticed an atmosphere parade in the distance and watched it until it faded further down the horizon. After a while, there was nothing else to do. She laid in bed and let her mind wander. She thought of the gardens, of Leia and her in the science center, and then her thoughts were clouded with the young man she had met earlier. For hours, he proved to be the main topic of her thinking. She couldn’t get him out of her mind. Everything about him bothered her and attracted her. Though, she hated the way he looked at her, making her feel so disclosed.
Then the door chimed again and she wondered sardonically if this was dessert. Rolling out of bed, she dragged herself to the door and activated it, sliding open with a hiss.
“Hello,” a warm voice said. Lilliya was surprised to see a beautiful woman standing before her. Her long chocolate-brown hair cascaded down her back and her dark brown eyes stared at Lilliya warmly. She wore a form-fitting red jumpsuit, with flight rank insignia embellished on the collar. “I’m Jaina.”
“Hi,” Lilliya said. The two young women stared at each other for a moment, Lilliya standing in the doorway. Lilliya, however, seemed to tower over Jaina.
“Leia sent me,” Jaina continued. “She wanted me to meet you. I’m her daughter.”
Lilliya frowned. It was strange to be under house arrest and be greeted by the President’s family member.
“Can I come in?” Jaina said.
“Sure, why not?” Lilliya grumbled. She was becoming more and more irritated by the minute.
“Sorry about my mom,” Jaina said, as she stepped into the living area. “She just wants to take every precaution when concerning you.” It was like Jaina was reading Lilliya’s mind, knowing exactly how she was feeling.
Lilliya kept a distance from Jaina, standing near the kitchen as Jaina leaned up against one of the couches.
“I’m not sure why I’m viewed as a threat,” Lilliya said, crossing her arms in front of her.
Jaina’s lip twitched. “In any case,” she said, “I thought you might want someone to talk to. So mom told me to come see you. I hear you’re a pilot.”
Lilliya cocked an eyebrow in suspicion, but played along. This woman deftly avoided Lilliya’s comment. “Yes, I am.”
“I captain the TwinSuns Squadron,” Jaina continued. “I’m sorry to hear about the Raider base. I didn’t know much about them, but I assume they were one of the topnotch military squadrons on the outer rim.”
Lilliya glanced away from Jaina to focus her attention outside. She could feel a lump in her throat swelling, but quickly forced it down.
Jaina seemed to understand, but didn’t change the subject. “I’m actually bringing a squad out to Endor with me to investigate what happened to the first team later tomorrow. Is there anything you could tell me about the alien battleship you intercepted?”
“The President is sending out another team? Doesn’t she think that’s a bad idea since they lost contact with the first one so easily?” Lilliya asked.
“My squadron is a little…different,” Jaina said confidently. “We’re able to handle unusual situations like these. Most of my squad are adept in the Force. We can anticipate attacks better than other squads.”
Lilliya took a deep breath. “Well…the only thing I can tell you is that this ship was able to wipe out my entire team and the military base in only a matter of minutes. For some reason, they left me alive…maybe to give the Galactic Alliance a little scare. Who knows? They have technology that isn’t recorded in any of the Galactic Military logs. I’ve never seen anything like it.”
“Did the ship have any likeliness to the Yuuzhan Vong?” Jaina asked.
Lilliya thought hard. She had really buried this memory as soon as she could, so bringing back into focus was difficult. “No…” she murmured. “In fact, the closest resemblance the ship had was to the old Imperial Empire.”
Jaina frowned. The Empire had been long gone and the Imperial Remnant had joined their forces with the Galactic Alliance near the beginning of the Yuuzhan Vong invasion. For the Remnant to be defecting now didn’t make any sense.
“During their first attack, they used old TIE interceptors,” Lilliya continued. “We thought it was a joke. We were able to wipe all of them out. But as soon as we did…they unleashed new ships. Fast and nearly impossible to fire on. Faster than anything we have…”
“The Galactic Raiders were using experimental ships, weren’t they?” Jaina said.
“Yes, V and Z-wings,” Lilliya said. “We had trained with them for a few years when they were given to us by the Alliance. They are supposed to replace all the older fighters. The technology is fantastic, but is nothing compared to what those alien ships could do.”
Jaina nodded in contemplation. “Seems like somebody was busy building a fleet behind our backs. Something stronger than us…”
“One more thing,” Lilliya said. “I remember that when the ship appeared, it gave no warning. Normally we can trace previous lightspeed coordinates, but this ship didn’t seem to have any. Our only warning was a…bend in space, so to speak. It’s something to watch out for. Maybe they have a cloaking device…”
“Maybe,” Jaina said. “It’s good to know, though. I’ll make sure we have our scanning sensors on at all times when we enter the Endor system.”
They were silent for a moment again. Lilliya was trying to remember if there was anything else important she could tell Jaina. Lilliya found herself already warming up to the woman, but maybe it was because of the common interest they had—both pilots, and pilots always knew how to get along.
“Oh,” Jaina spoke again, breaking the awkward silence. “I also came to tell you—or invite you to come to the YVA banquet.”
“I don’t think so,” Lilliya said, shaking her head. “I don’t fit in well in social gatherings like that.”
“Mom insists, actually. She said that you need to come in order to meet some of the generals and recruiters that could sign you up with another squad.”
“I’m sure I could do that another day,” Lilliya said. She had no interest in having  fun and hobnobbing with rich people.
“Yes, but not everyone gets an opportunity like this, where squads from all over would be in the same room together,” Jaina pushed. “You’d get your pick of the location.”
“Tempting,” Lilliya sighed. “But I’m not really in the mood to socialize.”
Jaina frowned. “Of course, I completely understand. I wouldn’t want to be going either, but I have to make a social appearance for my mother’s sake. You could always meet up with me once you arrive and I could make sure nobody unwanted bothers us.”
Why was Jaina trying so badly to convince Lilliya to go, she wondered. It didn’t look like Jaina was going to drop the subject easily and leave. So Lilliya chose to go the “excuse” route.
“Isn’t it a formal thing? I have nothing to wear anyway.”
“That’s not a problem,” Jaina perked up. “I have the perfect dress for you.”
Lilliya tried to hide the groan that emanated from her tight-lipped grimace. Why couldn’t she just drop it?
“Dresses don’t really suit me.” Lilliya tried one more time to get Jaina to give up and leave.
“Oh, this one will…” Jaina smiled, though Lilliya could have sworn she detected a note of sarcasm.
“I guess I don’t have much of a choice, do I?” Lilliya grumbled, but gave in to Jaina. She supposed the distraction wouldn’t be so bad and it might make the night go by faster.

Lilliya was a little lost. She knew she took one of the lifts when she left the gardens, and it shot further up the palace till she reached the top. Now she was in a much more elaborate and lavish corridor with more wide windows looking out towards Coruscant’s cityscape. Noting the expensive looking décor, she assumed she must have ventured into a much more wealthy living area.

Rather than returning back down to the lower levels, Lilliya was compelled to explore the richer apartments. She found herself wandering down the brightly lit hallways until she reached the end. She was about to turn back around, but the apartment at the end of the hall had its door wide open. Lilliya cocked her head to the side in curiosity. Who would leave their door open, she wondered.

She stood alone in the hallway; there wasn’t much traffic up in the higher lofts compared to the lower ones. In fact, the hallway she stood in was completely empty. Lilliya waited to see if someone would come out of the apartment and close the door. She couldn’t explain why she cared, but she had the itching feeling to explore inside. She moved closer to the open door, trying to make her walk look casual just in case someone decided to show up.

“Hello?” she called into the apartment, barely leaning in an inch.

No answer.

“I noticed your door was open…” she called again, a little more timidly this time. Still, nothing. Lilliya glanced behind her to see if anyone was coming, then slinked into the entrance. She held her breath as she went through.

There was nothing really spectacular on the inside other than the vast amount of living space. Lilliya descended down a few steps into the circular living area. Everything was very clean, almost untouched. The room had a spectacular view of the city and Lilliya found herself staring out the window for a few minutes. In the corner of the room, the sunlight glinted off something silvery. More curious than ever, she turned to where the reflection came from.

A silver object stood elevated on one of the mantels by the holovid projector. It was oblong and obviously made out of a silver metal material. It floated in the air and must have been held up by a type of magnetic field. Lilliya thought she recognized the object as she got closer. Carefully, she wrapped her fingers around its cylindrical shape and pulled it away from the magnetic field. It was surprisingly heavy in her hand for how simple it was, and very cold, though the room temperature wasn’t any colder.

Gripping it tighter, for fear of dropping it, she noticed a small knob on its side. She touched it.

Suddenly, the object came to life. A deep blue laser-blade shot out of the topside of the cylinder, humming and vibrating loudly. Lilliya nearly dropped the thing in shock, but thankfully had a tight enough grip on it that her hands were shaking from the vibration.

And she knew exactly what it was.

Her heart began to race as she quickly began to realize who’s room she was in, but before she could plan her hasty escape, the lightsaber was yanked out of her hand by some unseen force, the blade disappearing back into the hilt, and landing in the hand of a man.

Lilliya swore under her breath as she slowly turned around to face whoever was behind her. There stood a young man, probably in his early twenties, with dark blonde hair that seemed to shimmer with red in the sunlight, deep blue eyes shaded by thick, curled lashes, a straight nose and chiseled jaw, rosebud-shaped lips that were definitely curved into a frown. He wore a blue flight suit, academy rank, Lilliya recognized, black gloves and black knee-high boots. The man hooked the lightsaber onto his utility belt.

He was very good-looking, and very irritated.

“What are you doing?” he said, his voice deep and annoyed.

Lie! Lie! Think of something!

“I didn’t realize the apartment was occupied,” Lilliya said, her voice shaking nervously. “I saw the door open and it didn’t seem like anyone lived here. Until I saw that.” She pointed at the lightsaber.

The man didn’t say anything, but his hand reflexively rested on the lightsaber’s hilt. He continued to stare at her, frustration becoming very obvious in his blue eyes. This made Lilliya even more nervous. Not only did Jedi and their mysterious power called the Force make Lilliya feel very vulnerable, but their mere presence made her uneasy.

Feeling frozen in place, Lilliya stared back at the man, waiting for him to say something else. The two continued to stare at each other, not moving, as though two highly dangerous predators faced each other for the first time, not knowing what to do, whether they should attack or run.

Finally, he said, “This isn’t something to mess around with.” He gestured to his lightsaber.

Lilliya broke away from his blue-eyed stare for a second to glance at the silver hilt.

“I’m sorry about that,” she said, looking back up at him. His eyes were scrutinizing, almost invasive. It made her feel exposed. She could feel her cheeks warming. “I was curious…” She shrugged.

“You could have killed yourself,” he said, “if you don’t know what you’re doing.”

Lilliya nodded, glad to know that the man cared somewhat about her well-being. That was a good sign.

“Well,” she said, “it definitely won’t happen again. I’ll be going now.” As she side-stepped the man to leave the room, she noticed other figures in the door way.

“Mr. Skywalker,” a deep mechanical voice reverberated. Her GP guard droids now stood in the hallway, their glowing red eyes zeroing in on Lilliya.

“Oh, great,” she muttered.

Ben Skywalker glanced at the droids, the only non-organic droids allowed as legal by order of the Advisory Council, and then back down at the disgruntled girl. His feelings were a mixture of shock, anger, paranoia, and amazement. First, because he had no idea someone would be in his apartment. He had only been gone for a few minutes. Second, because he found someone intruding on his privacy and this “someone” was undetectable by the Force. Thirdly, because she couldn’t be detected, and that made him feel threatened by her. Fourthly, because she was not only beautiful, but fascinating to look at.

Her skin was a soft ivory color without a blemish or a freckle. Her hair was bright gold and curly past her shoulders. She was tall and slender, her curves perfectly proportioned. A sparkling crystal glittered in the sunlight and reflected against her breasts, which Ben didn’t fail to notice. Her lips were pink and full, and her face was of a gentle, elegant structure.

But it was her eyes that really caught Ben’s attention. Her right one was a sparkling, sapphire blue while the other was an emerald green. And within the green eye was a strange, diamond-shaped scar. When Ben stared at her, he saw the scar flash different colors, from light to dark. He’d never seen anything like it.

“Mr. Skywalker,” the main GP droid spoke again. “We apologize for the interruption, but we are ordered to escort Commander Lilliya Tentle back to her quarters.”

Ben cocked an eyebrow. He wondered why heavy duty military droids were assigned to someone like her. At least, she looked safe enough. Then again, she did have his lightsaber in hand. Who knows what she would have done with it?

“Who’s orders?” Ben asked.

“President Organa Solo,” it said.

Ben looked over at Lilliya curiously. He supposed he’d have to talk with his aunt Leia to get any answers about this strange girl.

“You‘re not an escaped convict or anything like that, are you?” Ben asked Lilliya, a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

“No,” Lilliya frowned.

“Well, then I guess you’d better go with them,” he said to Lilliya, a wry smile tugging at his lips.

A flash of disappointment crossed her face. Maybe she was hoping he’d get her out of the situation, but why would he do that after she’d just intruded on his home.

Lilliya’s shoulders slumped in defeat and shuffled to the waiting guard droids. Ben followed her out and watched her disappear down the corridor with her intimidating entourage.

Commander, he thought. Ben decided he would investigate this commander and talk with Leia. Maybe she couldn’t sense the girl either. He slightly hoped that was the case and that he wasn’t getting rusty with the Force. He would talk with Leia as soon as he cleaned up and showered. He had a very long and irritating day at the Academy. Perhaps it was because he was distracted when sensing his father’s presence arriving in Coruscant City. He was not looking forward to seeing his father today.

***

The door chimed, snapping Lilliya out of her bored daze. Evening was approaching and Coruscant’s two suns were sinking towards the horizon, shrouding everything into a deep red-gold. Lilliya had been laying on her bed, head resting off the edge and staring lazily out the wall-length window, everything upside down. She wasn’t allowed to leave her apartment without the guard droids following her every move. This time the droids used their sensors in case the room ever registered as empty, which made it pointless to try to escape at all.

So Lilliya tried to sleep away the day. When that didn’t work, she tried to entertain herself with the holovid. That lasted for about an hour before she turned it off. When she refused to go out for dinner if the droids had to follow her, dinner was sent to her. She ate it, but hated it. She didn’t understand why she had to be a prisoner when she only did her duty by warning the Galactic Alliance.

Lilliya, then, noticed an atmosphere parade in the distance and watched it until it faded further down the horizon. After a while, there was nothing else to do. She laid in bed and let her mind wander. She thought of the gardens, of Leia and her in the science center, and then her thoughts were clouded with the young man she had met earlier. For hours, he proved to be the main topic of her thinking. She couldn’t get him out of her mind. Everything about him bothered her and attracted her. Though, she hated the way he looked at her, making her feel so disclosed.

Then the door chimed again and she wondered sardonically if this was dessert. Rolling out of bed, she dragged herself to the door and activated it, sliding open with a hiss.

“Hello,” a warm voice said. Lilliya was surprised to see a beautiful woman standing before her. Her long chocolate-brown hair cascaded down her back and her dark brown eyes stared at Lilliya warmly. She wore a form-fitting red jumpsuit, with flight rank insignia embellished on the collar. “I’m Jaina.”

“Hi,” Lilliya said. The two young women stared at each other for a moment, Lilliya standing in the doorway. Lilliya, however, seemed to tower over Jaina.

“Leia sent me,” Jaina continued. “She wanted me to meet you. I’m her daughter.”

Lilliya frowned. It was strange to be under house arrest and be greeted by the President’s family member.

“Can I come in?” Jaina said.

“Sure, why not?” Lilliya grumbled. She was becoming more and more irritated by the minute.

“Sorry about my mom,” Jaina said, as she stepped into the living area. “She just wants to take every precaution when concerning you.” It was like Jaina was reading Lilliya’s mind, knowing exactly how she was feeling.

Lilliya kept a distance from Jaina, standing near the kitchen as Jaina leaned up against one of the couches.

“I’m not sure why I’m viewed as a threat,” Lilliya said, crossing her arms in front of her.

Jaina’s lip twitched. “In any case,” she said, “I thought you might want someone to talk to. So mom told me to come see you. I hear you’re a pilot.”

Lilliya cocked an eyebrow in suspicion, but played along. This woman deftly avoided Lilliya’s comment. “Yes, I am.”

“I captain the TwinSuns Squadron,” Jaina continued. “I’m sorry to hear about the Raider base. I didn’t know much about them, but I assume they were one of the topnotch military squadrons on the outer rim.”

Lilliya glanced away from Jaina to focus her attention outside. She could feel a lump in her throat swelling, but quickly forced it down.

Jaina seemed to understand, but didn’t change the subject. “I’m actually bringing a squad out to Endor with me to investigate what happened to the first team later tomorrow. Is there anything you could tell me about the alien battleship you intercepted?”

“The President is sending out another team? Doesn’t she think that’s a bad idea since they lost contact with the first one so easily?” Lilliya asked.

“My squadron is a little…different,” Jaina said confidently. “We’re able to handle unusual situations like these. Most of my squad are adept in the Force. We can anticipate attacks better than other squads.”

Lilliya took a deep breath. “Well…the only thing I can tell you is that this ship was able to wipe out my entire team and the military base in only a matter of minutes. For some reason, they left me alive…maybe to give the Galactic Alliance a little scare. Who knows? They have technology that isn’t recorded in any of the Galactic Military logs. I’ve never seen anything like it.”

“Did the ship have any likeliness to the Yuuzhan Vong?” Jaina asked.

Lilliya thought hard. She had really buried this memory as soon as she could, so bringing back into focus was difficult. “No…” she murmured. “In fact, the closest resemblance the ship had was to the old Imperial Empire.”

Jaina frowned. The Empire had been long gone and the Imperial Remnant had joined their forces with the Galactic Alliance near the beginning of the Yuuzhan Vong invasion. For the Remnant to be defecting now didn’t make any sense.

“During their first attack, they used old TIE interceptors,” Lilliya continued. “We thought it was a joke. We were able to wipe all of them out. But as soon as we did…they unleashed new ships. Fast and nearly impossible to fire on. Faster than anything we have…”

“The Galactic Raiders were using experimental ships, weren’t they?” Jaina said.

“Yes, V and Z-wings,” Lilliya said. “We had trained with them for a few years when they were given to us by the Alliance. They are supposed to replace all the older fighters. The technology is fantastic, but is nothing compared to what those alien ships could do.”

Jaina nodded in contemplation. “Seems like somebody was busy building a fleet behind our backs. Something stronger than us…”

“One more thing,” Lilliya said. “I remember that when the ship appeared, it gave no warning. Normally we can trace previous lightspeed coordinates, but this ship didn’t seem to have any. Our only warning was a…bend in space, so to speak. It’s something to watch out for. Maybe they have a cloaking device…”

“Maybe,” Jaina said. “It’s good to know, though. I’ll make sure we have our scanning sensors on at all times when we enter the Endor system.”

They were silent for a moment again. Lilliya was trying to remember if there was anything else important she could tell Jaina. Lilliya found herself already warming up to the woman, but maybe it was because of the common interest they had—both pilots, and pilots always knew how to get along.

“Oh,” Jaina spoke again, breaking the awkward silence. “I also came to tell you—or invite you to come to the YVA banquet.”

“I don’t think so,” Lilliya said, shaking her head. “I don’t fit in well in social gatherings like that.”

“Mom insists, actually. She said that you need to come in order to meet some of the generals and recruiters that could sign you up with another squad.”

“I’m sure I could do that another day,” Lilliya said. She had no interest in having  fun and hobnobbing with rich people.

“Yes, but not everyone gets an opportunity like this, where squads from all over would be in the same room together,” Jaina pushed. “You’d get your pick of the location.”

“Tempting,” Lilliya sighed. “But I’m not really in the mood to socialize.”

Jaina frowned. “Of course, I completely understand. I wouldn’t want to be going either, but I have to make a social appearance for my mother’s sake. You could always meet up with me once you arrive and I could make sure nobody unwanted bothers us.”

Why was Jaina trying so badly to convince Lilliya to go, she wondered. It didn’t look like Jaina was going to drop the subject easily and leave. So Lilliya chose to go the “excuse” route.

“Isn’t it a formal thing? I have nothing to wear anyway.”

“That’s not a problem,” Jaina perked up. “I have the perfect dress for you.”

Lilliya tried to hide the groan that emanated from her tight-lipped grimace. Why couldn’t she just drop it?

“Dresses don’t really suit me.” Lilliya tried one more time to get Jaina to give up and leave.

“Oh, this one will…” Jaina smiled, though Lilliya could have sworn she detected a note of sarcasm.

“I guess I don’t have much of a choice, do I?” Lilliya grumbled, but gave in to Jaina. She supposed the distraction wouldn’t be so bad and it might make the night go by faster.

The Revolution: Chapter 6 part 1

Lilliya woke with a start. Rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, she peered out towards the window. It was daylight, but she couldn’t tell what time. She glanced at the chrono that stood by her dresser and saw that it was past noon. She slept the whole night away and then some.

And then she noticed the pounding. She couldn’t tell if that was her head or the door. She realized, now, that the brisk knocking was what had woken her up in the first place.

“Coming,” she groaned, knowing quite well that no one would hear her, and she rolled out of bed, rewrapping the disheveled dressing gown around her slim body, and dragged herself to the door. She caught a glimpse of herself in one of the mirrors and groaned again. Her hair had matted on one side her of head where the bandage was. There was still little clots of dried blood knotted on that side too. Her eyes were puffy from crying and her face was sickly pale. She was in desperate need of a shower.

This time a bell chimed inside the apartment. Whoever was trying to reach her, needed her badly, she surmised.

Finally, Lilliya made it to the door and opened it.

Leia stood on the other side dressed in a dark purple gown laced with gold.

“Good afternoon,” Leia said, though her expression didn’t reflect anything positive at all.

So it wasn’t a dream, Lilliya thought. “Find something?” she said.

“Actually, I came to tell you we lost contact with the investigation team,” Leia said, her voice hardened with stress. “The last time we heard from them was late last night. Their transmission said something about an alien spear, or weapon of some sort, on the Raider base ruins. Then nothing.”

“Humph,” Lilliya sighed, leaning against the door frame.

“Do you have any ideas?” Leia said, impatience seeping through her tone.

“I can only think that maybe—just maybe they were attacked by the same battleship,” Lilliya answered, though she hoped that wasn’t the case.

“Yes, but I keep wondering how you were able to get by without getting shot down as well,” Leia said.

Lilliya stared at Leia curiously, her brow furrowing. She was beginning to wonder if Leia thought she had anything to do with this.

“I found a way to activate the cloaking device on the shuttle,” Lilliya explained. It really was that simple.

“That’s interesting because the science team can’t even make a dent in the shuttle, much less get inside of it,” Leia said, cocking her head to the side to peer at Lilliya with a very critical eye.

Lilliya stared back, a little unnerved by Leia’s barely hidden hostility. Only then did Lilliya notice the same intimidating guard droids lurking a few ways down the hall.

“I’m not sure what to say,” Lilliya said slowly, trying to not get herself in trouble. “I was able to get inside with the medallions I found in the pocket of one the aliens that attacked me on Endor. They were taken away from me by the guards that met me on the docking bay when I landed.”

“Lilliya, I’m going to need you to come with me,” Leia said. “Please get dressed as quickly as you can.”

Lilliya frowned in concern, but did as she was told. She took a sonic shower, then donned a simple black jumpsuit and knee-high boots she found inside the closet full of clothes. She let her hair air-dry which resulted in a curly mass of gold waves, and her crystal necklace glittered brightly against the black. She was out and ready to go in fifteen minutes.

Leia had already left the corridor and the GP droids stayed to greet Lilliya at the front door. Their red eyes stared at her silently, which added to the eeriness. Lilliya stepped out of her apartment and followed them to the science center. It took them about half an hour of riding lift tubes and shuttles before arriving at GP’s science center, which was located far below the palace grounds.

Lilliya and the droids walked down a skinny corridor with low ceilings, giving a very claustrophobic illusion. The only light given was from simple florescent white lights nestled in the corners of the metal flooring. After a few minutes, they finally entered a large cave-like room where the alien shuttle lay surrounded by many scientists of different species, all donning white jumpsuits with glowing yellow piping.

Leia stood alone on a tiny walkway that led to the elevated platform the shuttle rested on, her purple gown billowing off the bridge’s edges. Leia turned to see Lilliya making her way over to the bridge, frustration clouding her already irritated thoughts as she still wasn’t able to sense Lilliya’s arrival. Leia was unsuccessful in hiding her disappointment.

“Thank you for joining us,” Leia called before Lilliya was able to reach the bridge, her voice echoing off the walls of the large metal room.

Lilliya stepped onto the bridge and was taken aback by the drop of the floor beneath her. She decided to keep her focus ahead of her and not below her.

“As you can see, the scientists are unable to activate the opening to the shuttle,” Leia said, once Lilliya reached her. The two women stood side by side on the bridge watching the scientists work around the shuttle like a swarm of insects. One of the scientists, tall, skinny and green-skinned, a species Lilliya didn’t recognize, walked over to the two women, the medallions in hand.

“When I was on Endor, I was able to kill one of the aliens that approached me,” Lilliya said. “I used its thumb and pressed it against one of the medallions. It not only disengaged the cloaking device, but opened up an entrance to the ship.”

“Give Lilliya the medallions,” Leia ordered once the scientist had reached them. The scientist looked willing enough to hand over the tiny items to someone else this time.

Leia turned to watch Lilliya has she balanced the two medallions in either hand. Lilliya pressed her thumb on one of the medallions, like she had the day before when she was inside the ship, and immediately the shuttle hummed and an entrance shot forward, shocking nearly all the scientists that were in the way.

Leia cocked an eyebrow in curiosity, then quickly became suspicious. “You see, those scientists had tried everything to open up some sort of entrance,” Leia said, her voice very quiet and controlled. “They even pressed their own fingers to those medallions with no response from the ship. I find it curious that you were able to open it up with one try.”

Lilliya didn’t say anything. She glanced from Leia’s critical stare and back to the ship, its entrance yawning open for everyone to see. Lilliya was just as confused as to why the medallions responded so easily to her. She had no explanation to give and was afraid to suggest anything; she could already tell she was walking on thin ice.

The two women watched as the scientists tentatively made their way inside the shuttle with their scanning instruments out and ready to use. The tall, green-skinned scientist pulled out a thin white scanning pad and held it out silent in front of Lilliya.

Lilliya’s brow furrowed in confusion and looked at Leia for an explanation.

Leia shrugged. “We anticipated the ship responding to you seeing as you were able to fly it,” she said. “The science team would like a copy of your thumb print in case they run into anymore situations like this.”

Lilliya hesitated, but it didn’t seem like she had much of a choice. She decided she’d better cooperate considering the heavy speculation she was under. She pressed her thumb to the pad and a blue light flashed beneath it. Once that was done, the scientist returned to the others and they continued their research.

Leia turned back around and began walking towards the cave’s exit. Lilliya followed closely behind.

“I’m surprised your personal aide didn’t greet me earlier,” Lilliya said.

“Mazy was apart of the investigation team sent to Endor,” Leia answered.

Lilliya nodded in understanding. That might have been why Leia was in such a sour mood, and Lilliya wouldn’t blame Leia if she thought Lilliya was the cause of all this.

The two made their way down the claustrophobic corridor and headed for the lift.

“I have a full day with my family arriving and the YVA banquet to prepare for,” Leia said as she stepped into the tube, turning around to face Lilliya and giving a hint that Lilliya was to not follow her inside. “You are welcome to attend, if you like. There will be military officials and diplomats from all over. It might be good for you to meet some of them and see what your options are career-wise. I will keep you informed if anything changes in the Endor system.” With that, Leia disappeared behind the rotating lift door and another one opened, empty.

Lilliya couldn’t shake the sinking feeling that she was not in the best of situations. She couldn’t remember the last time she felt so alone. And then she forgot the GP droids standing directly behind her, waiting for her to enter the tube.

“Guess it’s just the five of us, right, guys?” Lilliya muttered half-heartedly, in an attempt to lighten the situation. Maybe the droids could actually talk back.

But they didn’t, as they stared back at her with their cold red eyes, one of them pointing to the lift tube as if that was a hint.

Lilliya slumped in defeat and shuffled forward into the tube, the droids always close behind.

 

***

“She’s not giving in,” Captain Jorn said, as he made his way down the star-studded, circular hallway. Admiral Maurel’s private quarters were just a little ways down, but the only entrance was the small tube of-a-hallway made of thick glass that allowed the sensation of walking in space. Jorn could never figure out if this was an intimidation tactic on Maurel’s part, or if he was simply obsessed with being surrounded by billions of stars. “The serum doesn’t seem to be working on her,” Jorn continued when he knew he could see Maurel’s sinewy figure at the end of the hall.

Maurel remained silent even when Captain Jorn was only a few feet away. The tall, silver-haired man, with the brilliantly young face chiseled into perfect beauty stared out one of the large view panes, his sapphire eyes slightly glazed over. They didn’t seem to be watching anything and barely noticed Jorn’s arrival—except for the scar in Maurel’s left eye. That black-as-space, diamond-shaped scar always seemed to be aware on its own, always watching, absorbing…the scar glittered in Captain Jorn’s direction and he quickly looked away. Jorn never liked making eye contact with Maurel because of this.

“She’s a surprisingly strong one, for her species,” Maurel finally said, his voice soft and soothing. “Up the dosage.”

“If we give her anymore, her brain will reject it. It will shut down,” Jorn said, noticing how much his voice carried in the large chamber. There was no other sound, no air flow coming from the ducts, no gentle hum reverberating from the ship’s mechanical insides. The Diamond Denominator was already a shockingly silent ship, but Jorn marveled at how Maurel’s quarters were the quietest of them all. It was a dead silence. All Jorn could hear was his own breathing; Maurel never seemed to breathe.

“Up the dosage, but do it slowly,” Maurel spoke so quietly that if it weren’t for the echo bouncing off the walls of the massive room, Jorn would have had to strain to listen. “Her mind will reject it, but not until we get all the information we need. There has to be a very good reason as to why the President would send her own personal aide out to investigate an insignificant incident like this. The Galactic Raiders were not on the Alliance’s high-priority list.”

“Yes, but the escaped shuttle, the one we didn’t destroy…” Jorn muttered. There were plenty of reasons as to why that particular situation irritated him. Why allow an escapee warn the most powerful military force in the galaxy that they were being invaded? But what most irritated Jorn was that he was in the dark, running a battleship full of clones and enslaved humans.

“So she’s made contact with the President,” Maurel said, smiling grimly.

“Which means she’s on Coruscant,” Captain Jorn said. “Should we send a team out to capture her?”

Maurel was silent for a moment. Then, “No. Penetrating Coruscant’s security defenses would draw too much attention to us. She won’t stay there for long. Once she leaves the system, we’ll then make our strike.” Maurel turned to face Captain Jorn completely, making Jorn automatically step backward. “Continue your interrogation. Draw as much information out of the girl that you can. Then get rid of her.”

“Yes, Admiral.”

“One more thing,” Maurel said, as he lifted a black metal box into view. It seemed to be a safe of some sort. “This was going to be sent to Coruscant, to the Galactic Palace. Be sure that it gets there.”

Captain Jorn saluted, took the box, turned, and briskly walked back down the starry corridor, all the while feeling pity for the young personal aide and what was to come of her.

***

 

Lilliya jumped down from an air duct high above the ceiling and quietly landed into a crouch onto the soft red carpeting. As soon as the GP guard droids had taken her back to her apartment and stayed outside the entrance, Lilliya figured she was under house arrest. After exploring her apartment for an hour, she was able to disengage the hidden security cameras and climb into one of the air ducts to escape her apartment unnoticed. She had a little trouble finding a way into the hallways, but it didn’t take her long. Lilliya wasn’t going to spend the rest of her day being watched and followed by those nightmarish droids.

She didn’t know how long it would take for them to figure out she’d disconnected the cameras in her room, she assumed not too long, so she wasted no time giving herself a personal tour of the Senate Apartments free of the lurking droids. Lilliya dashed down the hallways, turning sharp corners, passing other luxurious living quarters, common areas, spa rooms—this made her pause for a second as she looked with envy at the beautiful women and men, rich Bureaucrats she presumed, going in and out of the spa seeming refreshed and relaxed. Lilliya wondered if her temporary stay at the Senate Apartments would allow her a visit to the spa. Probably not.

She then saw a group of kids, Lilliya guessed about eight to ten years old, disappear behind some cloudy-white glass doors, laughing, shouting, and running to play. As the doors slid silently behind them, Lilliya caught a glimpse of greenery and maybe some wildlife. She decided to follow the kids. She remembered a rumor that GP station had the most beautiful gardens filled with plant life from all over the galaxy including some original organic life grown during the Yuuzhan Vong occupation. Lilliya had always wanted to see this garden and she had a feeling this was the entrance.

Looking cautiously around the large window-filled room, sunlight streaming in from all sides, and once she determined the GP droids still hadn’t noticed she’d gone, Lilliya skipped over to the white glass doors and stepped through.

She was right. Lilliya stepped inside a massive dome-shaped room made out of reflective glass, which in turn, made the room’s size double in appearance. She could see Coruscant’s blue sky coming through the glass and reflecting back in an odd way. It made the ceiling appear bluer than it already was. Inside resided plant life collected from nearly every planet within the galaxy and all organized by color and shape. There were reds, deep greens, bright blues, oranges, vibrant pinks and purples, and some, Lilliya was certain, colors that even the human eyes couldn’t register. The smells surprisingly worked in harmony together considering they were all drastically different species growing up in very different worlds. Who ever was the gardener had their work cut out for them, Lilliya surmised.

She continued slowly down a stone pathway with a canopy of red-gold and green vines curling above her, allowing herself to breathe in the peaceful atmosphere. She could visit this place many times, Lilliya thought, during her stay there. She could find privacy and peace, try to relax and clear her head. Forget about the past couple of days and find away to move forward. The depression, she knew, was well contained and buried beneath more important matters that needed to be addressed. Lilliya was afraid of facing the black hole that seemed to be growing deeper, no matter how much she pushed it back. She couldn’t allow herself to think about it, not yet. Not when there were so many other things to worry about.

Children’s laughter startled her out of her reverie, but she was thankful for it. The sound was positive and reminded her of happier times when she was a child.

Her father always told her that she was a special kid, much more vibrant and full of life, than the others. She was a fast learner and matured quickly. Her physical appearance also grew at a faster rate than was considered normal for a human being. At two, she was as tall as a five year old and spoke Basic as fluent as an eight year old. At five, she towered above all her other classmates at about four feet. Lilliya’s father had to remove her from public school because of the harassment Lilliya received for her looks. She remembered being picked on by the other humans because of the strange, color-shifting diamond scar that was embedded in her left eye. She also remembered being attacked by the school bully, a powerful child who claimed he could use the Force. The boy had grabbed her crystal necklace because Lilliya told him he couldn’t borrow it, and he ripped it off her neck. Lilliya had suddenly gone into a panic attack as soon as the necklace was in the hands of the boy. She rationalized later that her panic must have been because of her emotional attachment to the item that was found with her when her mother and father found her abandoned inside an escape pod.

In any case, the boy was punished and removed from school. A week later, her father decided to take her out as well, not wanting to risk another strange incident like that again. Lilliya’s father home-schooled her for the rest of her youth and then trained her to become a pilot. As a child growing up in the House of Tentle, always at her father’s side, a blue and green-eyed girl with gold hair by day and silver hair by night, she was the happiest child she thought existed. Though her own appearance unnerved her, making her the most unique-looking human being, her father helped her accept and appreciate her looks. He said she was the “most beautiful girl in the entire galaxy.” That helped somewhat. Nonetheless, she revered her childhood years as her best years so far.

And the way things were looking for her now, they were probably going to be the only best memories she would have.

Lilliya rounded a corner, passing by an odd looking marble statue with glittering jewel eyes. She stopped and looked down at it. It was a frightening little creature standing on two very long legs, slender arms outstretched and clawing, a wide mouth full of razor-sharp teeth, and a long whip-like tail. It looked more like something out of a nightmare. It didn’t seem to fit in with all the other colorful beauty, luscious green foliage.

Then she recognized a voice not too far away. Lilliya’s heart rate jumped up a notch, and she leaned past a gray stone pillar to confirm the voice.

Leia stood a few meters away, still dressed in her elegant, purple gown, laughing and embracing a man in black.

Lilliya decided it was best to move on before Leia noticed she was without her GP escort.

 

“Luke!” Leia cried, lifting up on her toes to wrap her arms around her brother’s neck. “You have no idea how glad I am to see you.”

“I could sense your hysteria all the way from Ossus,” Luke Skywalker smiled, holding his sister tightly in his embrace. He hadn’t seen his twin sister in what felt like many months. Luke’s workload on Ossus had kept him quite busy to the point of not being able to see his family members in the flesh. Only through holo-transmissions was he able to keep in touch. “Is it the banquet that has you bothered, or something else entirely?” He meant his comment to be taken lightly.

Leia hesitated for only a second, but that was enough for Luke to understand something was very wrong.

“Let’s not talk about it now,” Leia finally said, loosening her grip on her brother. “There will be plenty of time to clue you in. Right now, I want to talk about you, the JedI Order, that sort of thing. Oh! And you have no idea how anxious Han is to see you. He’s been talking about you nonstop and all the things you two will be doing once you get here.”

Luke grimaced only slightly. He knew what Han had in mind: cantina hopping. “Doesn’t he feel old yet?” Luke said.

“Not even close,” Leia smiled brightly. “There’s nothing that can bring him down. At least that’s one of us…”

Luke stayed silent for a moment, wrapping his arm around his sister’s shoulder. They walked down one of the many stone pathways that wound like a maze through the gardens.

“How are you feeling?” Luke finally asked.

“I’m fine,” Leia quickly answered. “Being President isn’t really the easiest of jobs. I sometimes wish I could go back and change it all, continue planet jumping with Han, just the two of us and the Falcon. But we all know where that would lead.”

“Some major crisis would occur back at the capitol,” Luke said. “And you would have to fly back to talk some sense into most of the crazy politicians who want your job.”

“I hope you know that I only took this job back to protect you and the JedI,” Leia said, nudging Luke in the ribs with her elbow. “If it weren’t for me, you all would be marked as fugitives and hunted down. So, technically, it’s your fault I’m back on the throne.”

“Yes, and I will be forever grateful to you for that,” Luke smiled wistfully. A brief memory of the late Jacen Solo and his strike against the galaxy years ago flashed through his mind. If it weren’t for Jacen and his unexplained turn to the dark side, which resulted in the murder of Luke’s own wife, Mara Jade Skywalker, the JedI wouldn’t be so feared and hated by most of the galaxy’s inhabitants. His sister was the sole supporter of the JedI Order and she was able to keep the government at bay when concerning the JedI’s future.

But Leia had lost two sons in just a decade, her only surviving child being Jaina Solo. There was speculation on that being the only reason she was voted back in office, but Leia didn’t care if it was sympathy that got her in. After losing both her sons, she needed something to distract her, and being President was plenty distracting.

“How is Jaina?” Luke asked, almost as though he read her mind.

“Doing well,” Leia answered, though it was hard to say when she barely saw her own daughter nowadays. “She’s very busy flying around the galaxy with her TwinSuns Squadron. She’s just like her father. Jaina will be here in about an hour, actually. She will join us for dinner before the banquet.”

Luke nodded, but didn’t say anything. His mind was working hard to not think about his own estranged son and the distance that had occurred between them. Ben Skywalker and Luke Skywalker rarely speak to each other, one reason being that Ben lives on Coruscant, attending GP Flight Academy, and another being that Ben had renounced using the Force for reasons unknown to Luke, or anyone. Ben had also expressed his disapproval of the JedI Order, an argument turned-fight between Luke and Ben. Since then, the two hadn’t spoken to each other. But, everyday, Luke thought of his son and wished he knew what to do to make it right.

“He’s fine too,” Leia said, also reading her brother’s mind. “Ben’s very busy up there.” Leia glanced up at the shiny blue ceiling, referring to the Academy’s flight training in Coruscant’s space. “He has dinner with me and Han once in a while, so that’s a good thing.”

“I’m hoping to convince him to come to Ossus with me this time,” Luke said quietly, though he knew his wish seemed feeble.

Leia grimaced. She knew Ben hated Ossus and wouldn’t go anywhere near it. She had a bad feeling another fight would break out and ruin their small family reunion.

“Do you think that’s a good idea?” Leia said. “I know you want him to open up to the Force, but he rejects it so passionately. It hurts him, to use the Force. I’ve seen it in his eyes.”

Ben was an infant during the Yuuzhan Vong invasion and had felt many deaths through the Force. As a child, he also felt his mother’s death and his cousin/mentor’s death through the Force. Because of this, he had been traumatized and learned to block out most of the Force senses. Ben also blamed the Force for the demise of Jacen.

“He can’t hide away from it forever,” Luke said, his voice growing more frustrated. “Ben is incredibly strong in the Force. If he isn’t trained…” Luke let his voice trail off. He would have said, “if he wasn’t trained, then Ben might have no control over it, which can result in him turning to the dark side…like Jacen.” But Luke couldn’t bring himself to mention Jacen’s name. He vowed to never speak Jacen’s name around Leia or Han. Especially Leia.

Just then, Luke felt an odd tremor in the Force. It was brilliant, strong, and bright as a supernova. And in that instant, it was gone, lasting barely a second.

Leia had noticed immediately, as soon as Luke froze in place. She tugged on his arm to get his attention.

“What is it, Luke?” she said.

“Did you feel that?” he said, his voice barely a whisper.

Leia was silent. She retraced her thoughts, but came up empty. She felt only the wildlife and plant life within the dome…some kids, a few tourists…

Suddenly, something beeped at her side. She lifted her wrist and activated the comlink that was wrapped there.

“Yes?” she said into mic.

“The commander, Lilliya Tentle, is missing,” a deep voice resounded from the com. “We assume she had deactivated the security cameras in her room. They aren’t responding to our commands. The GP droids have entered her room and found it empty.”

Leia gritted her teeth. She wished Mazy was here to deal with these situations. Luke looked down at her in curiosity.

“Have the cameras search for her life-signatures throughout the palace,” Leia ordered. “She couldn’t have gotten too far and I have a feeling she isn’t planning an escape. Still, I don’t feel comfortable allowing her to roam the palace unattended. Have the GP droids trace her signature as well and make sure they bring her back to her room.”

“Yes, ma’am,” the voice reverberated, then the comlink clicked silent.

“What was that?” Luke asked, a little taken aback that there was someone on the loose, someone Leia hadn’t mentioned and obviously thought was important enough to be held in house arrest.

“This was the thing I didn’t want to talk about,” Leia grumbled. “Well, you might as well hear it. We lost one of our military outposts on Endor, the Galactic Raiders. Something had attacked and destroyed the base completely, or so we were told. A young commander named Lilliya Tentle had supposedly escaped and warned us of a battleship of alien design that had attacked them. I sent an investigation team out there, but then we lost contact with them.”

Luke nodded grimly. The idea of a new enemy was sickening. The last thing they needed was another war on their hands.

Leia’s expression was contorted in aggravation, and there was something else, Luke noted. “There’s more,” he said, encouraging her to continue.

“Yes,” Leia said abruptly, her dark eyes flashing up to look into Luke’s crystal blue ones. “The girl—Lilliya Tentle—she…she doesn’t exist in the Force. I thought maybe she was Yuuzhan Vong, an imposter, but security scans confirm her identity as Lilliya Tentle. Only that—the Lilliya Tentle, commander of the Galactic Raiders is reported as human on her medical charts. This girl…is not.”

Luke remained silent for a moment, trying to absorb all this new information. He was surprised he didn’t read it before. Leia must be getting more skilled at hiding her thoughts from him.

“You sure there wasn’t a mistake made by the MD droid?” Luke finally said.

“No,” Leia said. “I saw the DNA scans myself. They are very similar, but there is one part of it that is drastically different.”

Luke nodded.

“Wait until you see her, though,” Leia said, her tone taking on more of a positive meaning. “She definitely catches your eye. Yes!—you must meet her!” Leia’s enthusiasm surprising Luke, even.

“If you meet her,” she continued, “maybe you could figure her out better than I could. She’s an enigma and I don’t trust her. But you could investigate her, probe her mind, see what you can find. Maybe take her to Ossus—”

“Wait a minute, Leia,” Luke interjected. “We don’t know who or what this girl is. I am not prepared to bring her to the JedI Temple where she could possibly be a danger to the students there.”

“Understandable,” Leia nodded in agreement, though she was so certain her idea was flawless. “But just meet her. I’ll make sure she attends the banquet and then, then you can figure her out for yourself.”

Got nothing? Whim and be a singer!

I had finished a concert up in the Prescott area, my daddy conducting the way, and the concert consisted of Lerner & Lowe collections. I sang Gigi’s “Say A Prayer,” and My Fair Lady’s “Show Me,” “The Rain In Spain,” and “Wouldn’t It Be Loverly.” These songs are very easy for my voice type; I could roll out of bed and sing them.

Singing has been a huge part of my family’s lifestyle. I was born a singer, my genes a combination of my mother’s coluratura and my father’s powerful tenor (very much like Pavarotti’s). I already knew being a performer was something I couldn’t really avoid. I sing for my father every summer and, once in a while, do community musicals. Singing will always be apart of my life in some way or form.

With that said, this particular summer, I had come to an interesting revelation. More like I was lectured by another fellow opera singer named Isola Jones.

“What are you going to do in California?” she asked me.

“To start my career,” I responded. “Be an actor and also try to get an internship with IGN as a writer.”

Isola stared up at me with a dark look, then finally said, “You need to be singing.” The tone of her voice was not humorous.

Later that evening, after the concert was over and done with, and all of us performers sat around a table, drinking wine and beer, eating prime rib and filet mignon, singing songs like O Danny Boy and laughing the minutes away, Isola took me aside. I was, at the time, distracted by some cute boy who kept looking in my direction. He wasn’t a part of our group, rather he sat at a different table with his small group of friends. All four of them kept glancing at our table—a table full of performers who don’t mind causing a lot of attention.

As I was about to approach the table with the cute boy, Isola took my arm and pulled me away. I remember feeling a flash of disappointment as I knew I would miss my chance exchanging flirtatious conversation—a conversation I knew would really lead me absolutely nowhere, but I was addicted to the feeling it gave my stomach, a sort of excited, butterfly effect.

Then Isola, red wine in hand, looked me straight in the eye, her exotic appearance always striking and, if I didn’t know her any better, very intimidating. She said, “Darling, you’re a fabulous singer. You need to be singing.”

“I know,” I said. “I wasn’t planning on stopping—” She cut me off with a wave of her elegant finger.

“No, no,” she said, her voice smooth and luxurious. “You are at that perfect age where this can work for you. You’re young, you’re fabulous, you have the drive that most people struggle with. You have no ties, no relationships, no children, nothing—this is the time for you!”

“She’s right!” Michael Tully chimed in. Apparently, more people were listening in on this topic of choice. Michael was a friend of the family and a baritone. He originally wanted to be a performer, make it his career, but he chose a different path. Michael fell in love, got married, and realized that in order to have a healthy marriage, he needed to focus on his family rather than his career.

Isola offered to teach me coloratura repertoire until I ship off to California. She said it would at least give me another choice to choose from, another path to add to my many different paths. It dawned on me that Isola Jones, famous Metropolitan opera singer, who had sung all over the world, had so much faith in my ability to sing that kind of music, I decided to take her up on the offer. Call it a whim.

Opera was definitely a field I never thought myself capable of. It was also a field I didn’t want to even try to venture into, considering my dad had already been there and done that. I wanted to conquer a different area of performance.

But now, as I sit at my desk, scribbling my thoughts onto this virtual paper, and after practicing a few good hours of The Doll Aria, I’ve come to realize, ONE, I do have a coluratura voice, TWO, I can beat the shit out of this aria, and THREE, I have nothing to hold me back, to tie me down, to stress me out, to worry about, to compromise, to give up, let go, miss out. The world is my playground and I have nothing to lose. I can choose everything and nothing. Nothing can stop me because nothing is exactly what I own.

If you are an actor, singer, dancer, musician, composer, artist, this is the life we choose; that is, if we plan on being successful. And by successful, I simply mean the ability to pay your bills without needing a second job.

Juggling a family and a performance life is one of the most difficult things to do. When the singer is off in some other country, city, or state for months on end, it is very hard on the other. This lifestyle, if continues the same way, has a high risk of divorce. My father was married for ten years to another singer, but he was the one getting hired. He was the one gone all the time, making a success out of the stage. By the tenth year and after three kids, they divorced. She couldn’t take it. Her jealousy and loneliness got the best of her, made her miserable.

But I’m not stupid enough to think that there aren’t some marriages and relationships that do survive. I know they’re there. I haven’t met one yet, but when I do, I’d really like to interview them and see how they make it work.

So this is the path I’ve chosen. The mostly lonely but hella exciting way! Look out, World, there’s nothing holding me back!

“It was the best of times; it was the worst of times”

It’s funny when you consider how these two things can occur at the same time. For instance, when I look back at the past few months, I can honestly say these were the best months of my life. Yet, they were also the worst months.

I went through an agonizing breakup, the kind you wished to create a self-induced amnesia because the memories were too unbearable to face. Because of this terminated relationship of two years, my mental state also seemed to deteriorate. My sanity was being held by a thin string over a cavern of despair. I forced myself to hide away the memories and try to rebuild new ones, but found I could only hide for so long before I was wallowing in emotional turmoil again.

Of course, I have an explanation for all this. I am too stubborn to admit that I was severely emotional without a really good excuse. Am I alone? I don’t think so…

I blame the birth control! The Depo-Provera, that evil shot that helped me stay un-pregnant (thank the stars), but took away all rationality and boosted my hormones to an unstable level. It was like my identity split in two; the logical side of me was watching from far away, screaming at the top of my lungs to get the attention of the crazy side of me, to say wake up and breathe! After a few weeks of enduring the breakup, the Depo was exiting my system. I didn’t have a period at the time, so with no more birth control, my system was attempting to regulate itself. I already knew I had severe PMS, more like PMDD, so imagine having a period come and go several times a month without any warning, making me go through PMDD more than a human brain can take. On top of that, I was dealing with the average emotional despair of a breakup. Only it wasn’t so average for me.

Considering I had to deal with being around the X and his new girlfriend more than I liked, I was failing miserably on the healing end of life. Which pissed the more logical side of me off because I hated looking like a pathetic loser.

I took upon heavy drinking as a way to ignore my loser pain. I thought that maybe if I burned away a certain amount of brain cells, I could burn away the history. Except that one night, while in a drunken stupor and home alone, my depressed subconscious decided to take all the pain I was running from and throw it right back in my face—like taking a butcher knife to my leg and arm. Unfortunately, I cried myself to sleep on the floor during the process and my crime was caught later by my roommates. This resulted in an ambulance trip to the hospital, even though the gashes weren’t deep enough to be considered fatal. I was humiliated and even more depressed because of my humiliation.

When my parents came to see me, I was horrified. I knew exactly what I looked like: sickly pale, unresponsive, cut up, laying in a cold, white hospital room, dying on the inside. I looked just like my dad’s little sister. She had killed herself.

So if that thought wasn’t enough to scare me out of my depression, I don’t know what could have. I went through weekly counseling and monthly psychiatry. I was put on Zoloft for the time being and waited until my period was finally able to regulate itself, my hormones leveling out, and my PMDD becoming more discernable.

I can laugh about it now, but I’ll never forgive the ambulance and hospital bills. I’m now on Prozac for only the week before my period, which counteracts the super bad moods. I made a list of all the reasons for my depression, if only to give myself some sort of reasonable excuse:

  • First breakup with first love (you know how they always say the first one is the hardest, well I believe whoever said that)
  • Birth control screwing up system
  • PMDD
  • Having to be around X and girlfriend without sufficient healing time
  • Already genetically infected (the Rowader women have issues)

Despite all of this!!!!…it was the BEST six months of my life (so far). During my depression, I developed a friendship with probably one of the most amazing persons in my life, Mat Solace. He was the light in my darkness. Along with him, my friendships with Rachel and Anthony became stronger because they watched me for three years go up and down on the happiness/sadness scale. Somehow, all four of us became connected at the hip. We embarked on exciting adventures and trips that wouldn’t have happened if I had never let go of my boyfriend. And I am ALL ABOUT adventures!

People say that there is always something good one can take away from a breakup. For me, it is the friendships and adventures. Those memories have replaced the bad ones. I promised myself, after the breakup, that I wouldn’t look for a rebound to repel the loneliness. But I guess you can say that I did find a rebound, and they were Rachel, Anthony, and Mat. Best rebounds ever! Best memories ever… Best times ever…